I have realized that blogging stopped being a priority in my life around the time Owen was born.  Instead of embracing the opportunity to document his milestones I felt an intense need for privacy.  I needed to devote time to living life and being with my children.  Writing publicly about them seemed like a mistake.  I wasn’t a blogger until Dawson was about 3 years old and I never really shared too much about him, either.

Sometimes I regret not sharing my memories, and I want to begin now.  But where do I start?

I could tell you (is there anyone out there?) about how Owen is almost 2 1/2 and he is talking up a storm.  His explosion of speech only started in the last month or so.  He’s been saying a only a handful of words for the last 9 months, but now he’s jabbering all day long.  It’s like watching a toddler talk show.  He tells me about the chippy (chipmunk) that got hit by a car near Grandma’s house.  He talks about playing football with his Guy.  That’s what he calls his big brother.  He refuses to say Dawson’s name.  Instead he’ll say things like, “Where my Guy go?” after Dawson leaves for school.  It’s the cutest thing.

This morning he found the stash of sour gummy worms and Jolly Rancher jelly beans I’ve been hiding until Easter.  He brought the bags to me and said, “Mumma, me have gummy?  Me have gemmy bean?”  I just giggled.  The cute is killing me.   It’s not so cute when he tells me “no” however.  I will ask him to pick up his toys and he just gives me a devilish grin and says, “No!”  I can’t get upset with him, though.  He’s just too cute.

Owen is fascinated with Bob the Builder.  When Dawson was around 3 years old we visited the National Railroad Museum in Green Bay, Wisconsin.  Thomas the Train was there and we bought Dawson a set of Thomas trains and Bob the Builder toys.  Owen is learning all the machines’ names.  I love hearing him say, “Scoop” and “Muck” because he’s so animated when he does.  Dawson pulled all the old Bob DVDs out of the cabinet and every day we watch an episode.  Owen just loves this show.  Just like his Guy.

Dawson is a first grader now.  He’s reading and practicing addition and subtraction.  I can’t get over how much he’s grown.  At 7 years old, his favorite things are Star Wars Legos, watching the Clone Wars cartoon on TV and playing soccer.  He loves playing with the neighbor boys across the street, too.  They are home-schooled, and after Dawson does his homework he runs across the street to ride bikes with them.

As for me, I’m just busy finishing school, studying for my insurance exam and working full time.  We’re working hard to save money so we can start remodeling our bathroom and eventually the kitchen.  We are also trying to plan a family vacation but everyone has different opinions about where we should go and what we should do.  Dawson wants Disney World.  Doug wants to go to Canada.  I’m just happy with getting away from the chaos for a few days.

Welcome to my world.

Crazy. Busy. Fun.

The weather in Wisconsin has been unusually warm.  We never really had much snow and a few weeks ago the temperatures were in the 70s and 80s.  On my birthday (St. Patrick’s Day) it was 76 degrees.  I don’t remember having a birthday in which I could have sunbathed.  I didn’t of course.  I’m not swimsuit ready by any means.  That’s another thing I’m tackling.  I gained a few pounds over the holidays and I haven’t had a chance to get back to the gym.  I definitely need to shed this weight.  Once and for all.

Wah.  I feel like I’m whining and rambling.

Enough about me.  Time to get back to reading your blogs.   I miss you all.

Right now they are curled up on the couch watching something on the Disney channel.  It’s almost 10:30 here.  I feel guilty for letting them stay up this late, but they’ve been sleeping most of the day.  I’m pretty sure their sleep cycles are completely messed up.  I’ll probably pay for that tomorrow.

Doug had the day off and he took care of the boys while I went to work.  I’d almost rather have stayed home.  My day was totally unproductive.  We had a meeting from 10 a.m. to 11:30 and it put a wrench in my day.  I just couldn’t get back on track.  The audits I had to review were missing something; paperwork, questions not fully answered, uncooperative insureds.  I couldn’t wait for the day to end.  I can only hope Monday is better.

I’m worried about the kiddos.  I really hope Dawson starts feeling better quickly.  Sunday afternoon is his Cub Scout troop’s Pinewood Derby.  He and his father have been working on that car for days and Dawson is so proud of the work they did.  I loved seeing them spend time together, working on a project that seemed to be a lot of fun for them both.  They have yet to paint the car but I’m sure they’ll tackle it tomorrow.

I spent most of my night cuddling with Owen who is very clingy when he’s sick.  After awhile I had to have Doug take my place so I could get some of my homework completed.  This semester has been very crazy. Four classes is a lot!  I knew I’d have to focus, but I feel like I’m burning the candle at both ends.  Add in the insurance designation course I’m taking through work — it’s no wonder I’m always tired.

I love school and I’m looking forward to graduating this May, but it really is difficult to study and raise a family and work 40 hours a week.  I don’t know what I was thinking.  I’m no Wonder Woman.

The only thing keeping me going is the light at the end of a dark tunnel.  13 weeks to go until graduation…

Our Christmas was wonderful.  Dawson and Owen got just a few toys this year, but they were everything they wanted.  Dawson and his uncle immediately went to work on building the Star Wars Lego clone battle ship and they finished it in just over two hours.  It had like 4 million pieces and I knew I wouldn’t have the patience to put it together.  Dawson also got Super Mario Galaxy for the Wii and he loves it.  My sister-in-law bought him more Legos and my brother gave him a gift card and he bought Mario 3D World for his Nintendo 3DS.  He has been playing with his gifts ever since.

Owen loved the Little People Wheelies Stand N’ Play Rampway.  He was so excited when he tore off the wrapping paper and saw the toy.  Daddy and Mommy put it together immediately.  It has four race cars and Owen coerced his brother to play with him.  It really is a fun toy.

I got a few gift cards for Christmas and decided to spoil myself.  I bought both the Kindle Touch 3G and the Kindle Fire.  I didn’t intend on getting both.  It was sort of an oversight.

When the original Kindle first came out, I swore I would never buy one.  ”I love real books; paper and ink and binding,” I had said.  As an avid reader I have at least one hundred books on my shelves.  I didn’t like the idea of an e-Reader taking the place of my favorite novels.  Fast forward to now.  I can’t fit any more books on my shelves.  Friends have been suggesting I get a Kindle for several months.   I thought long and hard about it and decided to get one.

I went to Target with Doug and played around with the Kindle Fire.  I looooved it, but they were sold out at the store.  So I went online to Amazon and bought it.  While waiting for it to ship I started reading the reviews and some people were saying that they really preferred the E-ink on the Kindle Touch because it didn’t cause as much eye strain.  Another reviewer flat out said that avid readers should not buy the Kindle Fire.  I was miffed.  I tried to cancel the order with Amazon but it was too late.

Meanwhile, I went to Target and bought the Kindle Touch 3G with the intention of returning the Fire immediately after it arrived.  I fell in love with the Touch and have been reading Pride and Prejudice (yes, again – I love Jane Austen).  Then the Fire arrived.  I tried not to open the box.  I was going to just print the label and return it.  But then that little box kept calling me.  And without thinking I ripped it open and started using it.  I can’t return it now!

I feel guilty.  I really spoiled myself.  I don’t do this often.  I don’t ever buy “big” things for myself.  I like to justify the Fire as a gift for the whole family.  We can all use it.  Right?

Wow.  The guilt.  It is killing me!

I think this is just a combination of my natural tendency to worry (a lot) and lack of sleep.  I haven’t been in bed before 10 p.m. in many long weeks.  I’m tired of it.  Pun intended.

Okay, and I’m just too busy.  I’m still learning the ins and outs of my new position at work.  Training is an ongoing process.  There is so much to know about the insurance industry.  Even applying my years of insurance experience isn’t enough to breeze through this training.  Also, worker’s compensation insurance is complex.  Each state follows it’s own rules on what is defined as a covered employee and I’m constantly learning all the “tricky situations” and exceptions to the rule.  It’s no wonder I crash on the couch for 10 minutes the second I walk through the front door.  I have to give my brain a break.

Lately I have had zero ambition to do anything other than go to work, get my homework and studying done each night, and try (oh, do I try) to spend quality time with the boys.  My poor kids.  I have slowly realized they are beginning to prefer Daddy over Mommy.  Mommy is always busy.  Mommy is burning the candle at both ends.

I’m learning to let go of some of the Mommy Guilt, however.  Tonight after work I rushed to Dawson’s school to watch him in wrestling practice.  Then he had a Cub Scout meeting at the Lutheran church down the street (we’re Catholic, but all of Dawson’s classmates are in this particular pack and the meetings are within walking distance of our house – it’s like killing two birds with one stone because I squeeze in some much needed exercise).  Our den leader is the mom of Dawson’s best friend and their family attends the same church we do.  It’s nice to have friends I can commiserate with.  It’s a win-win.

This is Dawson’s first year in wrestling.  When the registration form came home from school I asked him what he thought about it.  He said, “Yeah, Mom.  I think I might like to try it.”

I was a little nervous the first night (which was yesterday) because he really had no experience with the sport, but thankfully his coach was a wrestler in high school and college so he had lots of experience.  I think I may have gone to high school with him, actually, as he looks very familiar.  I keep meaning to ask him his name, but I’m get sidetracked and forget.

Tonight, Dawson won a “take down” against a second grader and he was super pumped.  It makes me happy to see him having fun and learning so many different things.  Plus, he likes to be active.  It’s good for him.

Owen is growing like a weed.  I bought him some pants a few weeks ago and I realized tonight they are getting to tight in the legs.  My little guy isn’t so little.  He’s got a strong build and I can definitely picture him as a tackle on the football team.  He loves to do everything Dawson does and this evening they played a mini game of  ”wrestle mania.”  Thank goodness Dawson knows that he has to be gentle with Owen.  But little brother is definitely a brute.  He didn’t hesitate to charge at his big brother and take him down.  Good times.

Overall, things are good.  Crazy chaotic, but I can’t really complain.  Life is….good!

“Shut the door.”

“Turn it on.”

“Go in there.”

“Where’s mine?”

“Bye, baby!”

“My truck!”

“Where’s Dad?”

It was like he was holding all of these words in his mind until he could say them perfectly.  He talks so clearly, just like Dawson did.  I breathed a sigh of relief.  He’s talking.  There are some occasions when I have to listen closely to understand what he’s saying and I realize he’s practicing some of the words he hears.

For so long, when Owen didn’t want something he would just say “uh-uh.”  Yesterday I asked him if he wanted to go get the mail with me and he said, “Nooooo!”  It was the way he said it that had me laughing.  It was in the tone of a snotty teenager.  I had a flash of what I was in for when he gets older, but I knew he learned that tone from his big brother.  When Owen takes one of Dawson’s toys, Dawson says no in the same way.

All of this morning Owen has been running around the house yelling, “No!” and “Mine!”

I think we’ll be hearing these words for quite awhile.

Good times.

My blogging has sucked for over a year.  My photography is kind of boring these days.

I guess I just got busy.  School, work, kids, marriage.  Lather.  Rinse. Repeat.

I’m currently working diligently to get caught up with my online life.  It may take awhile.

In other, more exciting news, it is a proud day for Wisconsin!  The entire weekend was fantastic.  The Brewers have won two games against the Diamond Backs in this series.  If they win tomorrow they seal the deal!  Badgers won last night against the Huskers and the Packers pretty much kicked the pants off the Denver Broncos.

Due to getting the flu, I pretty much didn’t leave my couch and watched our teams win, win, win!

Can’t sleep tonight but I know have to hit the hay.  Gotta get up early for work tomorrow.

Happy Weekend!

Dawson went home sick on Wednesday afternoon because he threw up.  Owen had terrible diarrhea for three days.  I sprayed Lysol everywhere and used Clorox wipes on every surface.  (Sounds like promotion, but I guarantee it is not.  Just trying to kill germs here.)

And still, I got sick.  I had to leave work three hours early because I had the chills and my entire body felt bruised.  The aches and pains were so bad I whimpered while I crashed on the couch.

Dear God, please make it go away.  I can’t stand this illness anymore.

I assumed I was just having an allergy attack and dragged myself to the grocery store on my lunch hour. I picked up some Allegra (using a $2 off coupon – YAY!) and thought this would at least make me feel better. It’s 10:30 and I feel like death.

Now I’m wondering if it’s a cold. But here’s the thing, everyone in this house suffers allergies and we’re all “sick” so maybe it’s just a bad attack.

End Whine.

I’ve been so busy since the first days of school. My semester began August 22nd, and Dawson’s first day was September 1st. He was so excited to go back and see his friends. He even has a real smile on his face:

His first grade teacher just so happens to be Mrs. S and all of my siblings as well as myself had her as a teacher. Mrs. S is retiring after this year so I feel super lucky we get to work with her. She is so kind and caring and loves her job so much. She’s been teaching almost 40 years. Isn’t that amazing? So many teachers are leaving the profession for various reasons so I feel it’s wonderful that she has been teaching and loving it for so long.

Owen truly misses Dawson during the day. When I dropped him off at daycare yesterday morning he looked around the room wondering where his big brother was. I reminded him that Dawson was at school but Owen still stuck his bottom lip out and that pout was adorable and sad all at once. I love that my boys love each other so much:

I can’t believe how much they’ve grown. Just yesterday they were my babies and I rocked them in my arms. I still try to hold them on my lap when we read each night but they’re limbs are stretched out over half my body. They are not babies anymore. They are big boys. Time sure goes by quickly.

I had a pretty great day at work.  I was very productive and completed every task on my to-do list.  At the end of the day I’m just tired.  I ran down to the County Treasurer’s office to pay our property tax and that was a $1500 check I couldn’t stand writing.  July was a tight month and thank God the county gives a grace period of one week.  We officially have $94 in our checking account now.  Thankfully, the Huz gets paid again Friday.  Ugh.  I don’t know how we make it sometimes.

I look at our paychecks and realize we make an average (combined) salary. Not rich nor poor by any means.  We are truly a middle class family with they typical mortgage, car payment, etc.  We don’t have fancy cars or buy extravagant things. We manage to save a small chunk of money each month.  I just can’t wait to pay off this house – only seven more years…

Maybe money issues make me cranky, too. Seeing the Dow plummet is upsetting, too.

I just wish this Economy of ours was on the up swing.

Ugh.  I’m so grouchy today.

We’re cramming a lot of stuff into those fourteen days; like finally cleaning the house I’ve neglected since who knows how long, getting Dawson’s school shopping done, preparing for the boys’ birthdays (in September and October) and we’re going to sneak in a 4-day vacation at the end of August.  I’m looking forward to that!

This weekend was pretty laid back.  My parents came over yesterday to put together a slide for the boys.  My dad is so clever he found a way to attach it to our swing set.  Dad found the slide – in perfect condition – by the side of the road.  When he brought it over, Dawson asked where it came from.

“Someone threw it out and I rescued it,” Grandpa said.

Dawson replied, “Just like American Pickers!”

I blame my husband for this.  Those two watch Frank & Mike ritually.  They find junk hunting fascinating and while I think it would be great to find a gem in all the crap, I don’t have the patience to watch them dig through it all.  It’s like a glorified version of Hoarders.

Overall the summer wasn’t half-bad.  We did a lot of swimming, picnicking with family and friends, playing outside and going on mini trips to Bay Beach (an amusement park in Green Bay) and Pulaski Polka Days.  Yes, we love polkas.  Don’t judge!

Dawson and Owen have been outside so much their skin is a sun-kissed, golden peach color.  Thank goodness I slathered them up with sunscreen every day or they might be as red as lobsters.  Owen’s naturally brown hair is almost bleached blond from the sun.

This beautiful Sunday morning is beginning well.  Dawson is outside riding his bike with the neighbor boys and Owen is getting into mischief.  He loves digging in the silverware drawer and I’m constantly chasing after him and redirecting him to his toys.

We’re heading to church in an hour and so I’ll probably have to drag a very cranky Dawson back inside.  Good times.

Summer is ending quickly.  Time to go enjoy it.