September 6, 2008

Saturday Update

I’m so happy it’s Saturday.  The week was long and I felt as though I was constantly being rushed to complete chores and tasks and errands, both at home and at work.  Alas, I can relax a bit before the start of next week.  Or so I thought.

Last night I got a wild hair on my ass to clean the house.  That’s good right?  Well, no, not really — the urge to clean began at 11:46 p.m. and I actually ran the vacuum cleaner closer to midnight.  The funniest thing?  No one else in the house woke up.  Doug and Dawson sleep like bears in hibernation.  I wish I was so lucky.

Today, I’m working online for a few hours and then this afternoon I’m taking Dawson to Panacea, the fundraiser put on by Pacelli High School and the Stevens Point Area Catholic Schools.  Doug is alumni (even though he graduated from the public school, SPASH) and because we’re good Catholics, we go every year.

Dawson’s main attraction is the carnival rides.  I see a carousel, dragon coaster and ferris wheel in my future.

Tonight, my husband and I have plans to have dinner at the Red Mill, a local supper club that we both love.  We haven’t been out to dinner at a fancy restaurant in ages, so this will be very nice.  I’m so excited because the Red Mill has a wonderful prime rib on Saturday nights.  I’m jonesin’ for a slice of that.

Last weekend, I bought Dawson a new video game for the Nintendo DS called Mater-National.  We haven’t been able to put that game down.  Doug and I are competing against each other and it’s getting ugly.

For awhile, Doug was kicking my tail, but then I practiced after he relinquished the DS and now I’m beating the snot out of him.  It’s quite silly for two adults to be so involved in a video game, and poor Dawson is pissed off that his parents play it more than he does, but seriously - the kid will live.  Mommy & Daddy have some fierce competition going on.  Loser has to do all the housework, by HIMSELF, for six months, WITHOUT COMPLAINING OR MAKING THE WINNER FEEL GUILTY.

But really, if you have a DS and want a fun game to play, Mater-National is the bomb.  We loooooove it.

In other news, Dawson starts preschool next Tuesday, and as a last hurrah before life goes back to it’s normal insanity, Doug and I decided to take the Doodlebug to a Brewer’s game on Monday night.  This will be my fifth game this year, and Dawson’s third….and Doug’s first game this season.  He’s been so busy with work and his fishing excursions that he couldn’t make it to a game thus far.

We’re very excited because our seats are in the first concourse at left field (perfect for ogling Ryan Braun.  Me, not Doug.  Doug will probably ogle the cheerleader girlies).  It will be the last baseball game of the season that we’re able to attend, so I hope the Brew Crew kicks some behind.

Okay.  That’s pretty much the scoop around here.  What are y’all up to this fine day?

September 2, 2008

In Two Weeks…

…this little baby of mine turns 4 years old.  I’m a little depressed about this.  I don’t know why.

August 29, 2008

I Was a Blogger in My Former Life

I know.  I’m a terrible blogger these days.  I admit it.  I’ve fallen off the blogging bus and keep missing the others that go by.  I don’t know how my world has become nothing but a chaotic game of cat and mouse; constantly chasing around, trying to catch up.

I’ve been working like a maniac, both online and off.  It’s the offline world that beckons me.  Preschool is nearing, which I believe will be a gift from God, freeing two hours of my time from the many demands that Dawson makes.  I love that boy more than I can express, but he definitely knows how to push my buttons and get on my nerves.

Lately, he’s been addicted to a Spongebob video game on Nintendo DS.  The game is way too difficult for his age level, but the boy SCREAMS when I tell him to turn it off and play something else.  It’s all MUST PLAY THIS GAME, and darn it Mumma, WHAT DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND…around here.  I lost my temper with him this morning and gave the damn game a time-out.

I finally managed to catch up on some housework that piled up while I was driving daily to Marshfield when Dad was in the hospital.  Doug has been helping me when he can, but along with his manly help, comes the “rubbing it in” that he does.  It’s like he wants me to express my gratitude for doing chores that should be done every day anyway.  Like the dishes.  And vacuuming.  I’m only one person.  One VERY BUSY person and I’m so tired of feeling inadequate because I’m not Super Mom.  I’m tired of feeling guilty for not being able to do everything myself.

And I’m sick of feeling guilty for spending any minute of time on enjoyable things like scrap booking, stamping and my new hobby of sewing (I bought a sewing machine.  Yes, I did.  More on that later.)  I mean, don’t I deserve to relax instead of moving out of one task and into another?  Blogging used to be my favorite hobby, but I realized I haven’t been doing anything that warrants writing about because I’m always doing something around the house, running errands or working.  (And I love work, don’t get me wrong.  I just wish my husband would understand how much I do for the benefit of this family, and allow me my personal time without making me feel guilty for it.)

I’ve got five different blog posts in my drafts, nagging me to publish them, and I don’t have two minutes to take a deep breath let alone compose a brilliant piece on why I’m pissed off at Barack Obama.  Or why I think John McCain needs Prozac.  But I’ve started and I might just publish them before the 2012 elections, for God’s sake.

Last night my sister Rachel and I went to the last preseason Packers game.  My dad surprised us with his season tickets as his way of thanking us for all the things while he was laid up.  I wasn’t sure I had the time to go to a football game, but then I realized I won’t be able to do these kinds of things in a few months when busy holidays approach and preschool activities demand parental attention.

Doug was a little miffed about my plans, considering I just went to a Brewer’s game last Saturday with my brother and sister.  Considering how crazy it’s been around here, I understand his point of view.  But it’s not like he doesn’t go fishing every chance he gets.  I need “me time” just as much as he does.

In other news, our furnace is on it’s last legs.  We haven’t used it during the summer, obviously, but we had it inspected for the upcoming cold season.  It’s been chilly here the last few days.  Summer is over, crisp autumn weather is approaching.  Anyway, the new heat machine will be close to $5,000.00.  So, I’m staying on at the part time job through the fall.

Financially, we could use the extra money with Christmas coming up (I know, don’t mention it, right?  But it’ll be here before we know it).

I think working online and working part-time and being a mother and a wife (believe me, the mothering does indeed come first) is why life is so crazy right now.  Once I get into a routine, things will be much easier.  I can’t wait for Dawson to start preschool.  Those two hours sans whining are just what I need.

The plan for this weekend is to spend some time with my family.  The local fair starts tonight and I promised Dawson I’d take him.  He is excited to see the 4-H exhibits and animals and of course, ride the Ferris Wheel and Tilt-a-Whirl.

Come to think of it, my life is like a Tilt-a-Whirl.  I feel like I’m stuck on the one that spins contantly.  Stop.  I wanna get off.  I’d rather ride the Ferris Wheel.

August 26, 2008

Make the Pain Go Away

For the past few weeks, I’ve been tired.  Exhausted really.  My husband jokes that it’s all those sleepless nights, months of insomnia, catching up with me.

Migraines come and go every other day or so.  Aspirin, or Exedrin?  Neither helps.  Instead I find myself crawling into bed, in the darkness of my bedroom, a sleep mask over my eyes so that not even a pin-prick of light can sneak past the barrier I’ve created.

I lay down in the pitch black, crying tears of pain.  My temples throb.  It hurts to cough, sneeze and take deep breaths.

Noise disturbs me.  Frustrates me.  Makes me contemplate jumping out the window.  The nausea is unbearable.

Why do I have to suffer these headaches?

It might be my body’s way of slowing me down.  Like the yellow of a stoplight.  Caution!  Slow down!  Start taking care of yourself!

It’s true.  I’ve been taking care of the needs of everyone else, before my own.

Before my father’s accident, I was eating right, exercising and losing weight.  I made time for me.  Then stress caused me to fall back into my old habits of eating crappy food on the run and barely exercising.  I’ve gained half the weight back that I lost.

In the beginning, my motives for losing weight and being healthy were a little backwards, but I did learn to put myself on my to-do list.  Instead of worrying about buying school clothes for Dawson or keeping the house clean so Doug wouldn’t be crabby, or running errands for my mother, I learned to make myself happy and do things I loved to do.

Once Dad came home, life seemed to settle down a bit. Dad is doing well, recovering nicely.  I’m so happy that he’s finally out of the hospital.  But along with that sense of relief, came the migraines from hell.

They are terrible.  I don’t even have the ambition to do anything productive these days.  I’m constantly rubbing my head and squeezing my eyes tightly.  I’m always on the verge of throwing up.   Please, dear God, make it go away. Make the pain go away.