May 9, 2009

Power Struggle

Today is the first Saturday in which I have nothing planned.  No errands to run, no weekend obligations, no appointments or family visits.  It’s the first Saturday that I can spend at home doing whatever I want.

As I try to do just that, I realize the house is out of order again.  It’s nagging me.

• Dawson has toys scattered across the living room floor and I’m trying to fight the urge to pick them up.
• The mail is piled up on the side table, waiting for me to sort through it.
• My craft corner is so disorganized and it’s driving me crazy.
• Dawson’s room looks like the aftermath of a tornado.
• My bathroom counter is cluttered with cosmetics and hair products (which I’m not using because I’m too tired to care what I look like these days.  Sad but true.)
• The kitchen is actually clean, but dishes are still in the drying rack waiting to be put away.

Last Saturday I spent the day in a cleaning frenzy, but it was all in vain.  I came down with a nasty virus the next day and did not have the energy to maintain the house.

But you know what really ticks me off?  The fact that my husband didn’t even bother to step in while I was on my death bed.  (Okay, I’m being dramatic.  I know.)

I just don’t understand why it’s so hard for him to actually help me.  Sure, he’ll do dishes and laundry,  but he never puts the stuff away.  It’s so half-assed.

When he gets home from work he does what he wants to do.  Lawn care, gardening, puttering in the garage, whatever  — and I don’t complain.  But when I ask for help he gets bent out of shape.  Sometimes I think he thinks that because he works outside the home he shouldn’t have to do anything else.

This is total crap.  While he’s doing his stuff, I’m the one parenting Dawson and trying to get housework done at the same time.  This is like building a house during a tornado.  It cannot be done.  Dawson can be very demanding.  He’s an only child right now, and he’s gotten his parents’ undivided attention all his life.  I can distract him for short periods of time, but when he’s bored he lets me know.

To be honest, I feel like my husband and I are in the middle of a power struggle; each one of us is trying to be in control.  We’re not working together.  We’re both very stubborn, too.

It shouldn’t be so hard to communicate and cooperate.  It should be easy to just hash it out and come up with a plan to get stuff done.  But, why do I feel like I’m the only one willing to change? Why do I feel like the this burden will forever be on my shoulders?  Why do I feel like my husband just doesn’t get it?  Why do I feel like he doesn’t appreciate all that I do?

Knowing myself too well, I’ll start cleaning like crazy.  I’ll be crabby and resentful the rest of the weekend.  Knowing my husband, he won’t understand why I’m mad.  And I won’t tell him because I hate confrontation.  We’ll continue this power struggle until the end of time.

Should I just suck it up and do what needs to be done?  What would you do?

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Don’t forget!  Today is the last day to enter the Evenflo Comfort Select giveaway over at Dana reviews!  Comments will be open until 11:59 p.m.  Go enter!  And good luck!

January 18, 2009

Home Sweet Home

We’re back from our getaway weekend in Milwaukee.  Actually, we got home at one o’clock this afternoon, but I am so drained that I didn’t feel like doing anything but sleep.  Of course, I couldn’t do that until I returned the rental car, retrieved my child from Grandpa’s house (which took much bribing on my part) and unpacked all the bags and suitcases.

I’ve head a headache ever since I got home; the kind that hurts so terribly behind my eyes and at the bridge of my nose.  While I was driving home from my parents’ house, Dawson was chattering from the backseat about all the fun he had with his Poppa, and I kept thinking about swallowing two Excedrin and crawling into bed.  I think my exhaustion hit harder than I expected.  It was a long, 2 1/2 hour drive home, but the trip was worth it.  I’ve got a recap post planned and I’ll post it as soon as I finish some other important tasks.

I stopped at K-Mart today (before I went to get the Doodlebug — shopping is easier without him begging for toys) and picked up my prescription for Clomid which I’ll start taking tomorrow.  I’m pretty optimistic about this cycle, but I must say that even if it doesn’t work, I won’t be taking it next month.  I’m hoping this is the “boost” that does whatever it’s supposed to do.

Also at K-Mart, I got a new ceramic-barrell curling iron.  I’ve been wanting to curl my hair for awhile, probably because I can’t remember the last time I did something with my locks other than straighten them with a flat iron.  When I went to use my old metal-barrelled Revlon a few weeks ago, I noticed the curls went flat instantly.  My hairdresser told me that the metal ones cause static and the curl won’t set, and they are bad for the ends of my hair.  We’ll see how this new one works.

I also bought three new books, one of which is Marley & Me (I refuse to see the movie until I can read the book, although I said that about The DaVinci Code and I still haven’t finished that book — and I did see the movie when it was on HBO a while back).  Can’t wait to read that book, but I’m still trying to get through Gone With the Wind.  Even though I’ve read Margaret Mitchell’s masterpiece at least twelve times, I love reading it every few years.

Dawson got three new CARS cars and a children’s bible.  I knew I’d have to persuade him to come home, so I told him I had a surprise for him at home (even though I had bought the stuff before I picked him up, and had it in the car!).

My little guy didn’t want to leave his grandparent’s house.  This is the first time he’s spent the night there in a very long time.  Usually he starts to cry when it gets dark, and wants to go home.  But, since we were out of town, he had to get over his fear.  Grandpa took him tobogganing and sledding, they rented movies and had dinner at Pizza Hut.  No wonder he didn’t want to leave!  He was spoiled rotten!

So.  That’s what’s up so far.  More to come.  I just need to go to bed.  Sleep sounds so good right now.  I didn’t get much sleep last night at the hotel.  There was an argument between boyfriend and girlfriend on our floor and it was so loud that we actually had to call the front desk to complain.  They told us they received other complaints as well, and the cops were on the way.  Not sure what happened, but I saw two Milwaukee cops dragging a guy down the hallway when I was peeking out of the peep hole in our hotel room.  This was at 2 a.m., so needless to say I’m a little sleep deprived.  My bed is calling my name….

January 15, 2009

Finally Updating the Blob

I know.  It’s been four whole days since my last post.  I know. My sweet BFF e-mailed me to say, “Hey, DJ!  You gonna update that blob thing soon?”  And I laughed.  Oh how I laughed.  Blob.  That about sums it up.

I wish I had something exciting to report, but I don’t.  It’s been very cold in my part of the earth.  Negative 8 degrees, and worse if you take windchill into account.  It’s so cold that school was canceled last night for today. On my way home from errands last night, I stopped at the grocery store for milk and cereal.  I wanted to get everything I needed so that I didn’t have to go out into the frozen tundra today.  I knew everyone else had the same idea, because there were six cars running in the parking lot and very few spaces to park my car.

As luck would have it, both Doug and I are home today and we’ve sealed our cars in the garage, put blankets over the doors (because we want to keep as much heat as possible in the house) and are bundled up in our long underwear.  No sense in running up the heating bill if we don’t have to.  Dawson, on the other hand, refuses to wear clothes.  He’s running around the house in his pull-up because he says he’s “too hot” and I’m getting cold just watching him.  Nutty little boy.

I’ve got some posts planned for the rest of this week that will be scheduled.  Doug and I are going to Milwaukee this weekend for a little winter getaway.  I got tickets to see Frank Caliendo at The Riverside Theater in downtown Milwaukee.  We are so excited because my tickets are in the first row.  Doug told me the other day, “I hope he doesn’t make fun of the geeks in the front!”  I couldn’t stop laughing.  I’ll try to sneak the video camera in for some Frank footage.

So, that’s what’s up for now.  More exciting posts to follow.

Oh!  I almost forgot!  I’m over at the Imperfect Parent today, talking about motherhood and work and this illusion that women can “have it all”.  Head over there to check it out!

January 4, 2009

Dana + Dinner + Drinks + Partying All Night = Really Bad Hangover

Last night Doug and I went to a holiday party at the Red Mill restaurant.  We had a fabulous time.

Dinner was delicious.  We both had the ribeye steak and potato puffs, and I had chicken dumpling soup while he had the tossed salad.  Then we had cheesecake for dessert, too.  I had several cocktails — before, during and after dinner.  One too many cocktails.

(Speaking of the desserts, the waitress told us if we didn’t like cheesecake we could order an ice cream drink instead.  So then I said, “Oh!  Do you have the cricket one?”  And she replied without missing a beat, “No, but we do have the Grasshopper.”  That was totally what I meant.  Cricket, grasshopper — same family, right?)

I started out drinking a glass of Coca-Cola.  Then I decided since I drink maybe once a year I was going to enjoy myself and have a screwdriver.  After two of those, I switched to Malibu and OJ because the vodka was tasting funny.  That could possibly be because I was getting sloshed.

Doug had two Budweisers and then promptly stopped drinking so that he could drive us home, but the friends who hosted the dinner invited us to their house for a glass of wine, or coffee and to hang out.  Because we like these friends, Doug and I agreed.

When we got there, I decided to have soda so that I could sober up.  I thought that I could avoid a hangover that way.  It didn’t work.

While at the after party, Doug got to try a wheat beer that our friend E. offered him.  It was a German beer (I only know this because it had Weisse in the name) and let’s just say it was probably made of river water and rotten cheese because the toxic gas emissions these men were giving off could have killed a village.

We were just getting ready to leave (because my brother was babysitting and we didn’t want him to drive home too late) when S. got me involved in a game of Catch Phrase.  Oh my gosh is that way too much fun.  Imagine six drunk people trying to play a hilarious game, similar to the game Taboo.  Much laughter and cursing were shared.  I had the best time so I promptly purchased the game from Amazon.com today.

Right after I drank three huge glasses of water and swallowed an Excedrin.

Oh the headache.

Now were going to have lunch at the Tempura House.  Nothing cures a hangover like salty Chinese food!