July 30, 2008

BlogHer ‘08: Feelin’ Funky Friday

Friday at BlogHer was a day of non-stop activity. I woke up at 6:00 a.m. when the alarm in our room went off in my ear. Elizabeth had to work in the BlogHer Book Store, so she had to be up at that time. After turning off that screaming, wake-up machine, I tried to go back to bed. I had a migraine like you wouldn’t believe and I was thirsty. So very thirsty.

After popping an Excedrin, and downing an entire bottle of warm water (yuck, but it helped) I decided to try to blog about the night before. But, really, I was kidding myself. The in-room WiFi sucked and I was too distracted by all the upcoming events of the day.

I went down to the Mezzanine level for breakfast and after eating I got to try out the Wii Fit. Let me just say how desperately I want a Wii and Wii Fit. I’ve been coveting one for months and we just can’t shell out that money right now. Maybe by Christmas. (You hear that Nintendo? I’m in desperate need of a Wii. Can ya hook me up? What? Shameless begging you say? Yes. Yes I know.)

I met Krisco in the grand ballroom and we sat together to hear what Lisa, Elisa and Jory had to say during the opening keynote. The we did some speed dating and I collected and gave away oodles of business cards.

The speed dating session at BlogHer ‘07 really intimidated me, and halfway through it I found myself hiding in the ladies room. I really don’t know the reason, other than it was my first time at a blogging conference and I was so overwhelmed.

This year was much better because we had a different way of meeting new bloggers. We all sat at the table, talked for a few moments, exchanged business cards and when the time was up, two bloggers moved to a new table. It was like Survivor: BlogHer in San Francisco, as Lisa described it, and I liked this method much better than standing in two circles like we did in Chicago last year.

And this is where I finally got to meet this amazing, hilarious, wonderful blogger. She fucking rocks my world. I was so excited, I squeeed her. It’s only because I missed her in Chicago last year (I saw her in a panel, made a mental note to talk to her, but then missed her — so this year I was elated to talk to her and pose for a photo with her.)

After speed dating, it was time to head to my first session. I chose the MommyBlogging track and geared up for “Is MommyBlogging Still a Radical Act?” This session was very informative and the many viewpoints that other mom bloggers presented were interesting and relevant. Lindsay Ferrier did an excellent job of moderating the panel. The focus seemed to steer toward the monetizing vs. non-monetizing issue that so many of us get worked up about. Metropolitan Mama did a wonderful job live-blogging the session so I encourage you to read her post to learn more.

After that panel, my brain got a little fuzzy. I went to lunch and had a delicious Thai Beef salad. I can’t even remember who I sat with. I think it was Ashley. Yes, yes it was Ashley. I swear the days are blurring together, which is why it is VERY important to blog it all right away, yenno?

After lunch I attended the second MommyBlogging panel, “Public Parenting & Privacy”. I really enjoyed hearing what Shannon Lowe, Chris Jordan, Crystal McKee, Shino Tanaka & Shireen Mitchell had to say about the privacy and security issues we face when we blog so publicly online. It’s My Life live-blogged this session wonderfully, as well.

I learned a lot about the online dangers we face every day, and I became particularly concerned about using Dawson’s name publicly. Chris and Shannon use pseudonyms for their children’s names to keep their kids “Google Proof” and I worry about the fact that I didn’t do this.

Anyone can Google my son’s first and last name and read all about him, at least from the point of view of his mother. This issue is so duh! for me, because when I first started blogging, I did use nicknames for Doug and Dawson. Then one day I slipped up and used their real names and felt I had to continue doing so from that point on. I’m still not sure how to go about this now.

After this session, I stayed for the next panel: Mirrors: Ours, the Media’s, Our Cultures’ and Our Kids’ (live blogged at Body Impolitic). I enjoyed this panel because it talked about body image and some of the issues our children face about their own looks and self-image.

I asked a question and I was so nervous about speaking with a microphone at hand, so I was totally flustered when I revealed the morals I was raised with. For the record, I said “I was raised in a very strict Catholic family. I couldn’t wear anything that looked too sexy or too revealing. You can’t have sex before marriage. I held to that.”

What I was trying to say but totally screwed up in all my nervousness: “I was raised in a very strict Catholic family. I couldn’t wear anything that looked too sexy or too revealing. You can’t have sex before marriage. I held to that standard, until I was 20 years old.” (I just want this blog to be authentic and felt the need to correct the misinformation.) I don’t know why I was so darn nervous. Maybe because someone said our panel was being video recorded? (Still makes me nervous! Still!)

After that panel, I went to the Community Keynote and cried my eyes out. Not once, not twice, not even three times. No, I had to be the girl to cry four times in less than half an hour. I sat with Lorraine from Wifey’s House and I told her that wasn’t the first time I cried that day. I swear it was all the estrogen roaming the halls of the Westin St. Francis. And, that fact that each of the bloggers linked above wrote moving posts that were even more stunning when read aloud. Just hearing their voices and the emotions behind them really touched me.

After that we all went down to the cocktail party at Ruby Skye. Where I danced, just a little. Here’s a few Ruby Skye photos:

Ruby Skye is definitely one of the coolest clubs I’ve been to in awhile. But after this fabu party, we headed off to Maggie Mason’s house for her Haus Party. And I danced more (it was like funky dancin’ Friday or something). And that’s where I met Dooce. You already saw that photo. So I’ll share a few others.

Let’s just say that I was so tired at the end of the night I thought I’d never wake up the next day. But I did. At 6 a.m. to go to Yoga. I already told you about that, and yes — I know. I think I’m crazy, too. Stayed tuned for the BlogHer Saturday/Final Recap.

July 26, 2008

BlogHer ‘08: Thursday Edition

I know I’m very late in posting my BlogHer Conference recap, but after I returned home from the beautiful city of San Francisco, it took several days to decompress and return to normal life. Whatever normal is, I have no idea.

The Wednesday before my departure, I frantically ran around town as well as around my house, completing last minute errands and checking my luggage 80 million times to make sure I wasn’t forgetting anything. Total waste of time, because I realized I packed too much when the mountain of swag I collected wouldn’t fit in my suitcase. I ended up having to ship most of that stuff home on Sunday, because there’s no way that Northwest Airlines would let me check that bag without charging me $50.

I couldn’t sleep at all that night, the anxiety and anticipation were killing me. However, I had nothing to worry about, because this year’s trip to BlogHerCon was fantastic. 100% better than Chicago, and I love that Windy City.

Thursday morning I woke up at the ass crack of dawn, showered and got dressed, while Doug got Dawson ready. My boys were driving me to the airport and thankfully, I was smart enough to put all my bags in the car the night before. At 5:30 a.m. we were on the road for the 35 minute drive to Central Wisconsin Airport.

It was kind of difficult for me to leave Dawson. I must have kissed him 100 times and I started to cry as I walked into the airport and saw my little boy waving from the backseat as they drove away. Doug didn’t want to bring him inside the airport because Dawson wasn’t so happy with me leaving and it might have made matters worse.

After the usual checking-in procedures and getting through the grueling security measures, I was on my way to San Francisco . My plane departed at 7 a.m. and I was dreading the 4 1/2 flight. I was so excited to be going to California for the very first time.

I arrived in the City by the Bay at around 11:30 a.m. Pacific time, and I managed to find a shuttle to the Westin St. Francis Hotel where the conference was being held. Once I got to the hotel, I tried to check-in but didn’t realize the intricacies of hotel check-in procedures.

Turns out, I need a credit card with a huge limit in order to stay at the fancy Starwood hotel. For security reasons, we keep our credit limits low ($500 max) to avoid huge losses in the event our cards are stolen, so I wasn’t able to get my room keys. I tried to use my debit card to pay for the room in full, but apparently the Westin doesn’t accept payment in full until check-out (which is very, very strange) and instead they asked me for a cash deposit for the room cost plus $200 for incidentals.

Unfortunately, I don’t carry $800 in cash because my greatest fear is being mugged. So, I had to sit in the lobby for nearly two hours until my amazing roommate got to the hotel. She was able to use her American Express card to get us checked in.

While I was waiting for Anne and our other roommate Elizabeth, I found PunditMom wandering around the lobby and we had a quick bite at Caruso’s, a little cafe in the hotel lobby. While we were chatting, Jenn from Mommy Needs Coffee stopped over. A few moments after that, Christina from A Mommy Story popped over and we all hung out for awhile.

After that, Jenn welcomed me to her hotel room to wait for my roommates, and I met Busy Mom for the first time. She and Jenn were roomies and they graciously allowed me the use of their ladies room to straighten my hair and change out of my travel clothes.

A little while later, I met Krisco from Crib Ceiling and told her how much I missed Mary Tsao. She and Mary were roomies at BlogHerCon last year, and I told her I go to Flickr every day to get my Daily Dose of Mary via her fabulous photos. I was happy to learn that Kris does the same thing!

Finally, Anne called my cell phone to let me know she arrived at the hotel and just a little while after that we had keys to our room. Or so we thought. We got up to room 952 and started to put our luggage on the beds. The I looked in the closet and saw someone else’s clothes hanging in the closet. Anne discovered a man’s business cards on the desk. We had been checked in to an occupied room.

I made a frantic call to the front desk and told them about our problem and I was assured that we’d be checked into a fresh, clean, unoccupied room immediately. I ran downstairs to get the new keys and then Anne and I rode the elevator to the eleventh floor and where we found our new, much larger and totally awesome room.

We each claimed two corners of the room to toss our suitcases, and then I patiently awaited for Elizabeth’s arrival a little while later. Once she got in, I gave her a room key and then we all just sort of chilled for a few moments.

Elizabeth then introduced me to her friend Lori who came down to our room awhile later. Lori is awesome. She has this sweet, southern accent that I somehow managed to pick up. Okay, really, I’ve always had this knack for picking up accents, but the suthin’ speak is something I’m accustomed to, being that one of my closest friends is from Texarkana and whenever we hang out I start saying things like, “Fixin’ to” and “All y’all.”

After our introductions and a few photos, Elizabeth, Lori and I headed to the lobby to meet Jennster (also known as Dirty Mouth Whore, if you ask Lori — don’t worry, it’s a term of endearment, I promise) before going to the Kirtsy/Alltop party at Guy Kawasaki’s house. Anne stayed behind to freshen up and grab a bite to eat before the many other cocktail parties going on Thursday night.

Let me just say that Guy Kawasaki lives 31 miles south of San Francisco, and somehow we thought he lived 31 minutes south of the city. After a two hour shuttle ride to Atherton — two hours because our driver was a moron who twice passed the street we needed to turn onto — we arrived to a beautiful California home with rose bushes and hydrangeas lining the flower beds.

Guy’s backyard was meticulously manicured. Green grass, beautiful Japanese lanterns and swimming pool in shape of the number eight were just part of the scenery. The food was delicious. We had paella, grilled vegetables and barbecue in a cup, as well as delectable hors d’oeuvres and wines.

I was in awe of everything, and when I was introduced to Guy Kawasaki, I was rather shy. In all honesty, I didn’t know who he was, other than the founder of Alltop (and no, I’m not on Alltop, but I was asked that a hundred times that night).

We stayed at the party for about an hour and then promptly got back on the shuttle to head back to the city for the three other cocktail parties we had to attend. We stopped by the Mom Central party, the Experience Project Party and then finally, the People’s Party. (Note to future party hosts: Please, don’t have all the parties on Thursday night! It’s too much stress and takes way too much planning to be able to attend everything all in one night.)

I can’t exactly remember all of the goings on of Thursday night, but I’m sure the pictures will explain it all:

Shannon, Shannon, Crunchy Carpets, Liz, Amber & Me

Christina, Me, Deven, Lori & Jennster

Christina, Me, Julio & Lori

Lemon Drop…deliciously tart.

Yumm-O

Guy Kawasaki & Me

Me & Jennster and boob grabbage.

Jenn & Me

Caruso’s, in the hotel lobby.

More photos here.

Stay Tuned for Part II of my trip to BlogHer.

March 29, 2008

What’s New With Me? Quite A Lot.

I have a confession to make, dear blog pals. I have a job. I’ve had this job for nearly a month, and I wanted to tell you all about it sooner, but I hesitated because what I do is so wonderful, so perfect for me, and I love it so much. I didn’t want to seem like I was rubbing it in your faces. I’ve had a stroke of good luck and I’m so thankful.

Shortly after I lost my job, Lisa Stone of BlogHer informed me that the BlogHerAds network had a position available for a headlines editor. After learning more about it, I was offered the position and I gratefully accepted. I’ve been working from home for about a month and so far everything is working out wonderfully. Not only that, I love what I do. This opportunity has allowed me to work just the right number of hours and contribute to my family’s financial well-being. The bonus is that I’m able to spend more time with Doug and Dawson and my house has never been this clean.

This is also the reason why my blog posting has been sporadic and I do hope you’ll forgive me. It took a few weeks to learn the ropes and get a routine in place.

Many of you know that March 17th was my 29th birthday. Doug took me to Chili’s for dinner. Neither of us had been there before and our local restaurant opened last fall. The place was booming for months and we wanted to wait until the “newness” wore off before having dinner there.

We each had the shrimp and ribs combo. The food was good, but overpriced for what it’s worth. I had one cosmopolitan with my meal and it was so strong I think I was drunk by the time we left. After dinner we went to a bar called Partner’s Pub. People celebrating their birthdays can drink free all night. Four double drinks later and I was really sloshed. We were home by 8:30, and I only missed half of Dancing with the Stars. The new season premiered that night. I have to say I’m not really into it this season. I know you’re surprised. I am a diehard DWTS fan. Except my boyfriend isn’t dancing this go ’round and I’m disappointed. It’s not the same with out Maksim. Although I’m totally rooting for Priscilla Presley and Kristi Yamaguchi.

I agree with Maks when he says that another woman may not win Dancing with the Stars. It’s true. Most women are reluctant to vote for other women. I was terribly disappointed when Melanie Brown and Maksim took second place to Helio Castroneves and Julianne Hough. Melanie was the better dancer by far. She worked hard and had the technique. But I think women were wooed by Helio’s charm and good loooks. Helio was a great dancer, but not the best. Kelly Monaco was the first and only woman to win DWTS thus far, and I think it’s because of her soap opera fans.

Back to talking about me. Heh. So where was I? Oh yes. My birthday. So, I wasn’t as nuts after turning 29 like I was when I turned 28 — although I did have my obligatory meltdown about age and having babies and blah, blah blah. I was content about entering my last year in my twenties, that is until my husband discovered a dozen gray hairs on my head. I totally believe he gave them to me. Like a contageous disease. And then the SOB plucks two out of my scalp. I did end up buying the hair dye. My new color is a bit too light. I should have just forked over the $60 bucks and had it dyed professionally. It would have turned out better, I’m sure.

The Easter UPS man delivered Dawson’s Leapster L-Max on Thursday and when we opened the box he got so giddy with excitement I thought the kid was going to explode. “Mommy! That’s for me! That’s mine! I waited for it a week ago!” It was so cute. He even said to me, “This is my favorite toy, ever!”

He played it non-stop for eight hours that day. Yes, you read that right. Eight hours. And then the game stopped working. For real. My poor kid was heartbroken. We tried to change the batteries and it still wouldn’t power on. Friday morning we tried again and nothing. So I had to call the company and have them send a shipping label so that we can get it replaced. It will take two weeks. Dawson is devastated. We don’t even know what happened. He was so careful with that game. Doug thinks it was defective to begin with.

In other news, I leave for New York City this coming Wednesday. Did I tell you about this? I can’t remember. Let me just start again. Last fall I decided I really wanted to go to BlogHer Business ‘08. I talked with another fabulous blogger about going with me and sharing a hotel room and she said she had been wanting to go to the conference, too.

So, I booked an airline ticket, made the hotel reservation and waited patiently for the conference registration to open. When it did a few months later, I realized how expensive it was and decided that I probably wouldn’t be able to afford it. But then Kristy from Blogher told me apply for a BlogHerShip to live blog the conference tracks which would waive my fees. I was just going to do so when I lost my job, and so I canceled the hotel reservation.

Unfortunately, my air ticket was non-refundable. But Liz offered to have me over for a visit and I graciously accepted. Another turn of events and stroke of strange luck occurred, and it turns out I’ll be spending two nights in NYC (a pal of mine hooked me up with an apartment rental on the Upper West Side, two blocks from Central Park, at a too-good-to-be-true rate) and the third night with Liz in Jersey. I’m totally cool with that because I’ve always wanted to tour the museums of Manhattan, and I don’t know when I’ll have another opportunity. The best part is that an old friend of mine lives in Queens (the one who scored the apartment for me) and we’re meeting up for dinner on my first night in the city.

It’s strange that I’ll be a pseudo single girl in Manhattan, but I’ve wanted to do this for years and never did. I’m a little nervous about flying, though. The last time I was on an airplane was 15 years ago when I went to Washington, D.C. in ninth grade.

So, that’s pretty much what I’m up to these days. Tomorrow I’m going to tell you about my ridiculous shopping trip to Kohl’s yesterday. It’s a funny story. Stay tuned.

August 2, 2007

BlogHer Conference Breakout Sessions: Identity and Body Image

The headache I had Friday morning, or Day One of BlogHer, was terribly painful!  After a night of fabulouse cocktail parties, my brain was tired!  But I popped four Advil and made my way to the Grand Ballroom on Navy Pier.

It was amazing.  Seven hundred women in one facility, there to learn, to share and to connect with other women. 

I brought my lap top along but there really wasn’t any time to blog. 

Listening to Lisa, Elisa and Jory speak was empowering.  They were so genuine and inspiring and wonderful.  I struggle with the right words because it was my emotions I was most tuned into.  I couldn’t even focus long enough to take notes!  My thoughts were overwhelming: 

I can’t believe I get to witness this!  It’s unreal! 

I’m here, at a conference with mostly women, and we share a common bond – blogging!!!

How much better could it get? 

It did get better.  I had never experienced anything like that before.  It’s extremely difficult to sort through all the jumbled thoughts about the conference and I’ve been struggling for days. 

In fact, I only wrote about my travel struggles to give me more time to write coherently about the conference.  (Okay, and?  I promised Morra I’d record my Greyhound adventure.)

After the welcome session, it was off to my first breakout session.  I joined in with the Digital Exhibitionists discussion and it was definitely a learning experience. 

While I didn’t make it on time to get my goody bag of dildos (and anyway, we all know now what’s in my goody drawer at home), I did learn that talking about who we are and what we represent is a good thing. 

It’s okay to be a sex blogger, a mommyblogger, or a weight-loss blogger.  If it defines who we are there is no sense in hiding it.

This panel was full of great discussion about privacy and identity and sharing with the world what we write about.  I can’t seem to find a recap on this panel, so you’ll have to take my word for it when I tell you it was great!

The second breakout session I attended was Our Bodies, Our Blogs and Wendy McClure was inspirational in her discussion about obesity and society’s expectations about weight.  It felt wonderful to hear other bloggers stand up and say, “Yes, I’m fat and I’ve come to accept this about myself.”

It wasn’t in a self-deprecating way, either.  I mean what’s the opposite of skinny?  Naturally the word that comes to mind is fat.  And people, all people have fat on their bodies.  Some more than others.  This panel really encouraged me to be more accepting of my body and how I look and to make changes if I’m unhappy.  It’s not about what others think or say.  It’s about how I feel and what I think.

There was talk about the pressure of trying to conform to the air-brushed images we see in magazines, movies and television.  One recent example is when Redbook air-brushed Faith Hill’s photo on the cover of their magazine. 

Another example is the move Little Miss Sunshine.  Little Olive is standing before a mirror sucking in her belly because the other contestants are little Jean-Benet look-alikes.  It sickens me to think about all the girls, LITTLE GIRLS, who already have body image issues at such young ages.

And these images are blatant misrepresentations of what women, REAL WOMEN, look like.  Real women have breasts of all shapes and sizes.  Real women have bellies large and small.  We have hips and asses.  We have thighs.  And we are beautiful for who we are, no matter what our size or shape.

I could go on for days about how infuriating it is to see rail-thin women on the cover of vogue with their rib cages showing.  But I know every woman feels the same way.  You all know how maddening it is to see women going to great lengths (anorexia, bulimia, eating only grapes) to be thin.  

And on the other hand, we have women like myself, who struggle day in and day out with weight.  I’m overweight.

There I’ve said it.  I AM OVERWEIGHT.

At one time I wasn’t.  And the pounds on my body rise and fall constantly.  I can’t seem lose all the weight I think I need to lose.  And perhaps it’s because of my own distorted body-image issues.

As someone who goes to the gym, tries her best to eat healthy and think positively about herself, I still can’t seem to drop all the extra pounds.  Even after having a baby, I’m still holding on to that extra padding. 

I’ve listened as doctors suggested alternative weight loss methods (Gastric bypass, anyone?  Or maybe Liposuction?) I became angrier!  When are physicians going to listen to the facts and then prescribe a solution?

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been diagnosed with Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome, what I consider the catch-all diagnosis of women’s health struggles, such as fibroids, infertility, obesity, thyroid issues, etc.  It’s bullshit.

And I didn’t even know where to begin to make it all better.  Until I started blogging.  Just writing about my thoughts has given me the strength to make some changes.  I feel empowered.  I feel ready to change doctors until I get the answers I need.  I feel ready to take on any challenge that comes my way.

But most importantly, I’ve learned to accept myself for who I am both inside and out.