January 11, 2009
The Big ‘O’
I’m kind of afraid to discuss a certain topic, one that nags me every single day, because I’m always worried that if I say too much, if I think about it too much, I’ll jinx it all.
But you see, I’ve gotten some good news! Small scale good news, but good news just the same, and I feel like I deserve to celebrate this amazing discovery, even if it is silly or completely insane.
I’ve been charting my menstrual cycles for some time now — a little less than a year — and this month is the first in which my chart clearly reflects ovulation. Yes, that Big ‘O’ — what were you thinking?
I know, it’s goofy to be elated about what most women consider to be a simple thing, but really, ovulating has never been something my body has done effortlessly.
I suffer from PCOS and the disease really messes with me; physically, emotionally, mentally and reproductively. I take medication for this condition and I will have to take it for the rest of my life (save for a miracle), so when I saw the data on my chart, I cried. Happy tears. Tears of joy.
All of the charts before this month had inconclusive data, meaning that it’s possible I ovulated each month but stress or other factors may have affected my physical health and hormone production so there’s no solid proof — and if my ovaries did release eggs, they may not have been viable or were unable to be fertilized.
My doctor believes that for the past year, my body has been trying to adjust and regulate itself and perhaps I’ve finally crossed the threshold. Maybe this is the month. Maybe. I’m not getting my hopes up. Seriously. I’m betting I’m not pregnant and I’m okay with that. The fact that my body is finally working is amazing, and I’m content with this. I feel like I’m one step closer to my wish coming true.
Send all your good luck my way. You know, just in case.
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January 11th, 2009 at 1:22 AM, Dorsey Says:
Congrats on the big “o”!!! I’m sure I’d have felt the same way if we hadn’t “lucked into” having kids quite early in our married life. Here’s hoping for many more “o’s” in your future. =)
January 11th, 2009 at 1:24 AM, Jean@WorkingMomma247 Says:
Oh Dana that’s so exciting. I know you’ll take what you can get big or small. Sending all good O vibes your way!
January 11th, 2009 at 9:16 AM, Dana Says:
Yes! The O! That shift in a chart is so exciting isn’t it?
January 11th, 2009 at 1:10 PM, Caffeinatrix Says:
Dana, I’m SO happy for you! I know PCOS can be difficult to live with—I hope this means your body has turned the proverbial corner!
January 11th, 2009 at 9:13 PM, Amy Says:
Dana,
I’m so happy to hear about your “O”. Hang in there, this will lead to good things!!!! I’m praying very hard for you, and I will continue to send positive thoughts your way.
January 12th, 2009 at 1:59 AM, Headless Mom Says:
Celebrate! You’ve worked long and hard for this day and you deserve a little ‘happy Dana dance’ for your efforts!
January 12th, 2009 at 1:57 PM, Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah Says:
Good luck – headed your way.
January 14th, 2009 at 1:41 PM, radioactive tori Says:
I will never forget the excitement I felt the first time I ovulated. I thought so from my chart, but then when the doctor confirmed it with the blood test, I felt like I wanted to have a party to celebrate how happy I felt.
January 16th, 2009 at 5:17 AM, The Dana Files » Hope Says:
[...] been charting for months. But this month’s chart is clear as a bell. I know. I’ve blogged this already. It’s just that I’m so happy. So excited. I’m ready for this next cycle [...]