September 3, 2008
The Inevitable Abortion Post
I’ve stayed away from political blogging for several months. Don’t get me wrong, I keep up with the news and this election, but I’ve refrained from putting my hat into the ring. It may be because I’ve been frustrated with the non-stop, down and dirty, tooth and nail fighting that is going on between us.
It’s no longer a war between Democrats and Republicans. Political party has little to do with our personal beliefs these days. I know liberal Republicans and conservative Democrats and Libertarians who are struggling to find their footing in a divided political world.
I have a confession to make. I didn’t watch a single moment of the Democratic National Convention. It’s true. I read about it in newspapers and online news sources, but I refused to watch any coverage on television. I was angry. Too angry, to even turn on the TV.
I saw this video and lost my mind.
And then, I saw this video and became outraged.
Barack Obama, I voted for you in my state’s primary. I was confident about it. I was fully aware of your pro-choice stance. I was fully aware that with you as President of the United States, Roe v. Wade would remain in tact. I don’t agree with it. Not one bit. I’m pro-life. I’m Catholic. I’m a conservative Republican. Yet, I chose you, for more reasons beyond the abortion issue.
And then, I read this:
Barack Obama is drawing gasps from pro-life advocates today over comments he made during a campaign stop in Pennsylvania over the weekend. The leading Democratic presidential candidate appeared to back a potential decision by his daughters to seek an abortion saying he wouldn’t “punish” them with a baby.
Obama’s comments came in the context of off-the-cuff remarks addressing the issue of AIDS.
The candidate indicated he favored teaching both abstinence education as well as sexual education and he appeared to be hard-pressed to come up with something else to say when he brought up his daughters.
“When it comes specifically to HIV/AIDS, the most important prevention is education, which should include — which should include abstinence education and teaching the children — teaching children, you know, that sex is not something casual,” he said.
“But it should also include — it should also include other, you know, information about contraception because, look, I’ve got two daughters. 9 years old and 6 years old,” he added.
“I am going to teach them first of all about values and morals. But if they make a mistake, I don’t want them punished with a baby,” Obama said.
And then, you lost my vote.
Punished with a baby? Since when are children a punishment? What happened to teaching our children responsibility? I mean really, if my son got his girlfriend pregnant, or if my daughter became pregnant, the best lesson I could ever teach my children is to be responsible for their actions.
Barack Obama used the words “if they make a mistake.” Is he saying that sex before marriage is a mistake? Or is he saying that sex before a person is ready is a mistake? Is he saying that sex before the person is ready to be a parent is a mistake? If so, shouldn’t we be more diligent about teaching our children to not have sex until after they are married or in a committed, stable relationship?
I mean, really, I hear all the arguments that teenagers have the right to decide when they’re ready to be sexually active. I realize that teenagers are going to have sex if they want to, regardless of what parents have to say about it. If they are mature enough to make the decision to have sex, well then damn it, they better be ready to accept the responsibility and the fact that having sex may lead to babies, not punishments. They better be mature enough to become parents.
I’m so sick and tired of careless women (yes…I said careless) having sex, getting pregnant and “making a choice” to end the lives of their unwanted children. It’s insulting. I thought women were smart enough to be responsible, to not have unprotected sex, and to not make choices that lead to the pregnancies that they find “unfavorable”.
The other day I heard someone say that women should be allowed to the pleasures of sex without worrying about pregnancy. Okay fine. Then use birth control, right?
But wait!
Statistics show that 54% of all abortions happen despite contraception use. Only 8% of women having abortions have never used birth control, and 90% of the women most likely to have an abortion are on birth control.
So really, that just means that we women are making stupid choices, doesn’t it? We aren’t smart enough to understand that having sex can lead to pregnancy. And we aren’t smart enough to accept responsibility, and become mothers or place unwanted children for adoption. So instead, babies are aborted.
To those who are fighting to keep the right to abortion; what are you fighting for? Seriously? Really? Don’t you find it absurd that you’re grasping for the right to end the life of a baby? I mean, doesn’t that seem outrageous?
I know, you will defend your position by saying that pro-life activists and/or the government have no right to decide what women “do with their bodies”. You’re absolutely right! We have no right to tell you when you should or shouldn’t have sex. But once another life is in the picture, we have every right to be concerned and outraged about abortion. We are concerned with the rights of the unborn. They are human beings. Not cells. Not burdens. Not punishments.
Religion aside, abortion is murder. There is no gray area when it comes to the right to life. There are no justifications for ending a life. It’s not right.
I understand that there are extreme circumstances, such as the life of the mother is threatened or that the child may be born with severe birth defects and would die after birth (Down Syndrome is not a severe birth defect. So many beautiful babies are born with DS and live wonderful lives with the families that love and care for them). I’m not even going to argue those cases, because the number of abortions performed due to medical necessity, rape or incest are small.
The reasons women give for having an abortion underscore their understanding of the responsibilities of parenthood and family life. Three-fourths of women cite concern for or responsibility to other individuals; three-fourths say they cannot afford a child; three-fourths say that having a baby would interfere with work, school or the ability to care for dependents; and half say they do not want to be a single parent or are having problems with their husband or partner.
I’m sick and tired of abortion as form of birth control. It’s unacceptable and irresponsible. I know a woman who’s had three. Three abortions because she “didn’t want to be stuck with a baby” and “didn’t want to have kids with that guy” or the other guys.
What’s ironic is now, at age 36, she wants to have children with her husband of 3 years and she hasn’t been able to get pregnant. I watch her cry because she believes now, years later, that those babies were supposed to be born. And there’s nothing I can do or say to comfort her. She made those choices because she “had the right” to do so. It makes me sad.
I realize I sound preachy. I understand that my point of view pisses people off. But, do you realize that abortion is the issue that divides this nation? It’s not Democrats vs. Republicans anymore. It really isn’t even about liberals and conservatives. It’s pro-choice vs. pro-life that divides the nation. And I’m damn tired of hearing people throw around the words “anti-choice”. It’s insulting. Would you rather me call you “anti-life” or “pro-abortion”?
There needs to be a way for us to come together in this country, but I’m afraid it will never, ever happen because abortion is legal in this country. Pro-life activists will not compromise the right to life for the unborn. Pro-choice activists will not give up the right to end pregnancies. So what’s a country like ours to do?
I don’t have the answers. Barack Obama doesn’t have the answers. John McCain doesn’t have the answers.
This is the reason I may not vote in this election. I thought my support for Obama was unwavering. Turns out it isn’t. I don’t know if I can switch sides just yet, but I’ll be watching and waiting until someone comes up with the right answers.
Posted by Dana @ 8:56 am • Politics
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September 5th, 2008 at 7:48 am, Debbie Says:
I’m with you completely. I’m so sick of hearing that an unborn baby is not a living thing, and therefore it’s not murder. Look at how doctors are able to save babies earlier and earlier (aren’t we up to like 22 or 23 weeks gestation now?)…at what point will people start accepting that it’s murder? Children are so precious, and while pregnancy is not fun for a lot of women, take responsibility and go through it and give your baby to a loving family that desperately wants one.
Debbies last blog post..It’s Not Just About ME…
September 5th, 2008 at 11:48 am, Headless Mom Says:
Excellent, well thought out post, Dana.
I’m with you, by the way. (Well, not on the BO part-I’ve never been behind him. But yes on the other stuff.)
September 5th, 2008 at 4:32 pm, lizriz Says:
Hi Dana,
I thought this was an interesting perspective on what can happen when government gives a fetus more rights than a woman: An Open Letter to Gov. Sarah Palin on Women’s Rights http://tinyurl.com/5gps7d
lizrizs last blog post..Scenes from the Gynecologist’s Office
September 5th, 2008 at 6:12 pm, Dana Says:
Hi Liz!
Thank you for the link. It is an interesting point of view. The statistics of abortion as a medical necessity are very low, and in the cases mentioned in the letter were all medically related. I can’t argue those cases because I’m not a doctor.
Not one of the cases mentioned referenced abortion when the mother simply wishes to end the pregnancy because she doesn’t want the child.
I think I might be missing the purpose of that letter — is the author defending the right of women to choose how they deliver their babies? Or whether or not the end the lives of their babies?
Is the author saying that the law should not protect someone whose life is in danger? Because if we say it’s okay to end the lives of the unborn, on the flip side, will it be okay to end the life of any human being at any stage of life?
It’s really a fine line we’re toeing, on both sides, isn’t?
September 7th, 2008 at 3:27 pm, Roxanne Says:
I had a long post written out, but there’s no point.
September 13th, 2008 at 6:05 am, The Dana Files » So Shocked I Can’t Breathe Says:
[...] « Previous Main [...]
September 13th, 2008 at 11:29 pm, Gail Says:
I”m not sure how someone who holds conservative views could support Obama at all. I’m glad you changed your mind. HAving no respect for the life of another human, fetus, infant or otherwise, is very scary. I dont’ want someone like that in charge.
He is willing to let babies die for all sorts of reasons and can’t see why protecting living people in the United States is important. One foot follows the other.
Obama must realize there is something wrong with what he does, since he can’t seem to be straight about it. He’s a crooked man. And he would create a crooked house. He needs to not be in charge.
September 13th, 2008 at 11:32 pm, Gail Says:
Obama can’t seem to just be straight about what he believes. He’s a crooked man who would create a crooked house.
He has no respect for life. He is willing to allow babies to dies for whatever reason someone dreams up and doesn’t seem to want to protect citizens of this country.
I heard him say that if one of his daughters made a ‘mistake’, he wouldn’t want her ‘punished’ with a baby. That’s a man who is willing to allow his grandchild to be killed. What chance do the rest of us have? He needs to not ever be in charge.
September 15th, 2008 at 11:57 am, Liz@thisfullhouse Says:
I’m all for women’s rights - being a woman, and all - but, I have to agree with you, Dana…when you said:
“It’s really a fine line we’re towing on both sides, isn’t it?”
Especially, when abortion is used as “birth control.”
November 4th, 2008 at 11:52 pm, The Dana Files » Rooting for the Underdog Says:
[...] told that if we have unprotected sex with a guy we’re not so crazy about, and get pregnant, we can just have an abortion because we shouldn’t be “punished” with a baby. No matter how you look at it, both parties have flaws. Both candidates have [...]
December 1st, 2008 at 11:14 am, The Dana Files » Say What? Says:
[...] in this man. I voted for him in the Wisconsin primary, didn’t vote for him in the election (for personal and religious reasons — in all honesty I just couldn’t decide, you’ve read about my uncertainties [...]