August 26, 2008
Make the Pain Go Away
For the past few weeks, I’ve been tired. Exhausted really. My husband jokes that it’s all those sleepless nights, months of insomnia, catching up with me.
Migraines come and go every other day or so. Aspirin, or Exedrin? Neither helps. Instead I find myself crawling into bed, in the darkness of my bedroom, a sleep mask over my eyes so that not even a pin-prick of light can sneak past the barrier I’ve created.
I lay down in the pitch black, crying tears of pain. My temples throb. It hurts to cough, sneeze and take deep breaths.
Noise disturbs me. Frustrates me. Makes me contemplate jumping out the window. The nausea is unbearable.
Why do I have to suffer these headaches?
It might be my body’s way of slowing me down. Like the yellow of a stoplight. Caution! Slow down! Start taking care of yourself!
It’s true. I’ve been taking care of the needs of everyone else, before my own.
Before my father’s accident, I was eating right, exercising and losing weight. I made time for me. Then stress caused me to fall back into my old habits of eating crappy food on the run and barely exercising. I’ve gained half the weight back that I lost.
In the beginning, my motives for losing weight and being healthy were a little backwards, but I did learn to put myself on my to-do list. Instead of worrying about buying school clothes for Dawson or keeping the house clean so Doug wouldn’t be crabby, or running errands for my mother, I learned to make myself happy and do things I loved to do.
Once Dad came home, life seemed to settle down a bit. Dad is doing well, recovering nicely. I’m so happy that he’s finally out of the hospital. But along with that sense of relief, came the migraines from hell.
They are terrible. I don’t even have the ambition to do anything productive these days. I’m constantly rubbing my head and squeezing my eyes tightly. I’m always on the verge of throwing up. Please, dear God, make it go away. Make the pain go away.
Posted by Dana @ 9:55 pm • Bedlam, The Mommy Files
RSS feed for comments on this post.
TrackBack URI
August 28th, 2008 at 8:59 am, Sarah VM Says:
I know what you are going through with the migraines. I suffer from them at least 3 times a month for about 2 to 3 days at a time (lately). There is hardly anything that will help. Have you been to a neurologist? I used to take Topomax and that helped a little bit but I’m breastfeeding so I can’t take anything now.
Good luck!
Sarah
Sarah VMs last blog post..Having Fun At The Park
August 28th, 2008 at 12:19 pm, PunditMom Says:
I’m so sorry. I wish I had a magic cure, at least for the migraines. xo
PunditMoms last blog post..DNC on the Homefront: The Clintons Set the Stage for Obama