August 13, 2008
I’m Not Here… *Updated
I’ll be spending my day at the hospital. My father was injured in a minor accident, but it’s scary just the same. He was changing a tire on his truck when the jack slipped, causing the vehicle to fall on his face. After being transferred from our local hospital to St. Joseph’s in Marshfield, doctors say he’ll need reconstructive surgery after the swelling goes down. I’m hysterical. I keep imagining things turning out worse and I can’t bear the thought of losing my father.
And I’m angry because the accident happened last night, and my mother wouldn’t let my sister call me until this morning, because she claims she didn’t want me to worry. Yeah, that really makes me feel better.
I’ll give updates as soon as I know more, but in the meantime, please head over to the Imperfect Parent. I’m talking about work flexibility in scheduling. Now that the kids will be off to school, many parents are looking for work hours that accomodate their child’s school schedules. Have any ideas on this subject? Please leave a comment. I love to see all the great suggestions you all come up with.
And if you’ve been dying to read The White Trash Mom Handbook by Michelle Lamar, the White Trash Mom, head over to Dana Reviews to see what I have to say about it. Believe me, it’s good.
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My sister and I have been at the hospital since a little before 11 a.m. It was a 45-minute drive to Marshfield and we couldn’t find Dad’s “room” in the ICU because they moved him. Once we got there, I broke down into tears upon seeing him.
Dad is in a neck brace to keep from moving and causing more fracturing and he is so uncomfortable. For so many hours the doctors wouldn’t allow him to drink anything, and he is so thirsty. He can’t breathe out of his nose because of the swelling and his mouth was drying out from breathing through it.
He doesn’t look so good. Which I expected, but actually seeing the extent of his injuries and realizing how much pain he is in, I started to cry. Then I frantically tried to regain my composure. The last thing I needed was to scare Dawson.
Doug thinks I’m traumatizing our son by allowing him to see his Papa in this condition. I don’t know what to think. I would have taken him to daycare this morning, but after I freaked out when I found out what happened, there was no way Dawson would go to Renee’s willingly. Leaving me to worry about another thing in this difficult time.
Dad’s doctors say that he has a fractured eye socket, a broken nose, fractured cheek bone and his sinus cavity is caved in. The neurologist says there’s no brain swelling, which is a blessing, and his eye is fine. Once the swelling is relieved, he should be seeing normally again.
The scariest part of this is that he can’t have surgery until the swelling is reduced and this could take 7-10 days — and they’ll have to do a craniotomy. Part of his skull will be cut and removed to correct his injuries from the inside out. I nearly lost my mind when I heard that. It sounds risky and for the first time I saw the fear in my dad’s eyes. It breaks my heart.
The hardest part for me is not showing how freaked out I am. My dad is my rock and I can’t bear to let him worry about me worrying.
Dad’s got a great neuro-surgeon and oral-maxillofacial surgeon. Think McDreamy and McSteamy but not dreamy and steamy at all. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to watch that damn show again after this.
Now that they won’t be performing any surgery for awhile, they are finally feeding him soft foods like mashed potatoes, and he might be able to go home in a couple days to rest until the surgery.
My mind is racing, but I’m trying to hold myself together. Lots of things to do on Dad’s behalf. I’ll update that later. We helped him fill out disability forms from his job, but we’re waiting for the doctor to complete his portion.
Thankfully, Marshfield Hospital has computer I can use to check e-mails and file his insurance claims online.
I’ll try to update later, but right now I’m fuzzy as I try to navigate all of this information.
Thank you all for keeping my father, my family and me in your thoughts and prayers. It means the world to me. I can’t express the gratitude I am feeling, but I love you all so much.
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August 13th, 2008 at 10:24 am, Nicole (SAHM Ramblings) Says:
Sorry to hear that your father was injured! Sending my blessings and hoping all will be okay. Hang in there, Dana!
Nicole (SAHM Ramblings)s last blog post..Heads-Up: Precious Moments giveaway
August 13th, 2008 at 11:22 am, daisy Says:
I’m so glad he is ok. This brought back very scary/sad memories for me because as a child I lost my father to this exact type of accident. I’m so glad he will be ok. Sounds like a bit of a hard road ahead, but he has a loving family to help him with it.
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August 13th, 2008 at 11:34 am, Diane Says:
Oh my goodness! That is just awful news. I hope your Dad will be OK. I can’t even image how you’re feeling right now.
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August 13th, 2008 at 11:38 am, Liz@thisfullhouse Says:
Oh, I’m so sorry and praying for a speedy recovery for your Dad - hang in there, Sweetie!
Liz@thisfullhouses last blog post..Wordless Wednesday: Follow Me
August 14th, 2008 at 2:30 am, Cecilia Says:
Oh my, I am new to this site. And I just found out. You have my most sincerest of sympathies!
August 14th, 2008 at 6:10 am, laura Says:
oh no, dana. i’m thinking about you and your family. xoxoxox.
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August 14th, 2008 at 8:53 am, Rachel Inbar Says:
How horrible. I think it’s what your son senses and the things you say to him that are at least as important as what he sees. Sometimes hiding things from children is worse than letting them know the truth - they can imagine that things are much worse than they are.
Rachel Inbars last blog post..Met with my advisor
August 14th, 2008 at 9:20 am, Wisconsin Mommy Says:
Oh hon - having had the honor of meeting your dad and seeing first hand what a great person he is makes me feel even more badly that he has to go through this. We are keeping all of you in our prayers!
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August 14th, 2008 at 9:49 am, Dana Says:
Nicole, Diane — thank you, your good thoughts mean so much to me.
Daisy, I’m so sorry to hear about your father’s accident. My father’s surgeon has told him and our family many times how lucky Dad is to be alive. And the nightmares I had last night, ones displaying how morbidly things COULD have turn out, proves that God had a hand in getting him away from the truck before it fell further.
Liz, thank you for your prayers…we hear them. We’re praying right along with you.
Rachel, that’s what I was thinking, that if I take Dawson along, he’ll be able to see that it’s still Papa, but he just has an ouchie or two on his face. I think Dawson was scared, but after awhile he was telling Papa that he’ll be all better soon and that the doctors will fix him up.
Dawson seems more comfortable about it now. And I didn’t want to shelter him from this, because God forbid something worse happened, how would I explain why we didn’t let him see his grandfather? I sure hope I made the right decision.
Cecilia, Laura, — thanks so much for the well wishes. I really appreciate them so much.
WM — thank you. My father will be honored to know that you and so many others are praying for us. As soon as he gets better, I’m going to tell him so.
August 14th, 2008 at 1:41 pm, Debbie Says:
Oh I’m so sorry for your dad! I’m glad to hear that he will be OK and that nothing is life-threatening. You and him and your family are in my prayers!
Debbies last blog post..Are We Raising Strong Kids or Wimps?
August 14th, 2008 at 3:45 pm, David Wescott Says:
Wow - I hope everything turns out OK.
David Wescotts last blog post..Rail is Green
November 17th, 2008 at 7:02 am, The Dana Files » Talking about Depression Says:
[...] Yesterday morning I was startled by the telephone ringing at 5 a.m. My heart was in my throat as I ran to silence the disturbance before anyone else in the house woke up. At the same time I began to panic. No one calls that early unless there is an emergency. The last time anyone called me that early, my father was in the hospital because of an accident. [...]