March 18, 2008
Rambling, Ranting and Other Blogorrhea
I’ve been going to the gym five days per week because I’m trying to slim down. Way, way down. I’ve got to shed at least 100 pounds. I know you might be rolling your eyes at that statement, but it’s true. Seriously.
I’ve never been this heavy. It makes me sick just thinking about it. I’m not going to tell you my number, but it has a 2 in it. At the beginning of the three digits. This is not good. It’s not healthy, either.
I’ve ditched the fast food (unless it’s an extreme emergency — like the Shamrock Shake I had on my birthday), I’ve stocked up on fruits and veggies and lean meats.
I’m digging 30 minute workouts on the elliptical trainer and I attend two toning classes a week. This all good, right?
And yet, I’ve only lost four pounds. I know. I know. Muscle is working it’s magic here. But still, I’m not a patient person, I want this weight to melt right off of me. High expectations. Totally Unrealistic Expectations. I know this. I’m not totally naive.
Since I subscribe to nine million magazines (totally NOT my fault), one of which is called Self, I decided to take the challenge. The Self Challenge.
Not only that, I’m joining Christina in the Hot By BlogHer Challenge, too.
And, I want to fit into my fricken skinny jeans again.
Yeah. Remember when I said I’d write a coherent post? I fibbed. This is a rambling mess. I can’t even get a sentence put together these days. What the hell happened to me? It’s like I’ve completely forgotten how to blog.
Totally suffering from Blogorrhea. No doubt.
If you missed my latest Mommybloggers post, I highly suggest you run from here and go there. That post actually makes sense. Maybe. I don’t know. See? I’m in a bloggy rut or something.
Although I have some good posts coming up for other blogs, The Dana Files is suffering. For that, I apologize.
But anyway, back to the rambling.
I think I hit my breaking point when I was trying on clothes in Target on my birthday. I found some adorable things, but they quickly became ugly ass fashion disasters the moment I put them on and stared at my rear in the mirror with the dim lighting of the dressing room, which highlighted my biggest assets. It was horrible. I cried. Can we say “muffin top”? Followed by “pear shaped blob” a.k.a my ass? I think my ass grew an ass.
Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.
Thing is, I’m all for eating healthy and exercising, but my husband is not. He could care less about what he puts in his mouth. His weight barely fluctuates year to year. Not that he’s a thin mint, he’s got some marital bulge, too. But he does most of the cooking and I do most of the sulking when buttons pop off my pants.
I saw a photo of myself from Christmas and I was sick. I look terrible. And it’s not a self-image problem. I’m seriously overweight.
I have so much to say about this topic, but I can’t get the words to come out. I don’t know what my problem is.
Y’all better read this post quickly, before I wake up tomorrow and delete it.
RSS feed for comments on this post.
TrackBack URI
March 18th, 2008 at 11:04 pm, seven Says:
I know the feeling. I’d like to change as well… I am trying not to eat sugar to help, but it’s hard. I also have a 2 at the beginning of my three digits, and I’d like that to change so that I’ll be around to have children someday.
March 19th, 2008 at 5:38 am, mammacheryl Says:
I’m there, too. My first thought was that you might be exercising too much. I know it sounds odd, but if you are exercising as much as you are and not eating at least 1200 calories a day, your body might go into starvation mode where it holds onto everything and fights like hell before it gives up a pound. I counted calories for a few weeks to see what I was eating on my new nutrition plan, and I was eating so “clean”, I was barely hitting 1000 calories. I’d force myself to have a peanut butter sandwich. Once I figured out the right combination of calories and exercising, the weight starting dropping off pretty quickly. I don’t count calories anymore because I pretty much eat intuitively now and stay on track. Good luck, Dana. I know it’s hard. Believe me.
March 19th, 2008 at 6:41 am, daisy Says:
I’m with you on all of it. You have more will power than me tho…I’ve been having chocolate ATTACKS. Then once it’s over I can’t believe that I caved. About the husband tho…my husband was stick thin when we married (26 years ago) and he’s FINALLY started to put on weight. It doesn’t bother me a bit!
Mammacheryl is right…when I was on weight watchers (used to be a leader even - where has my motivation gone?) you have to eat enough to actually lose the weight in a healthy manner. I can’t believe you can do 30 minutes on the ellipitcal! I can barely get 5 in. I can walk on the treadmill all day long, but the ellipitcal is HARD.
Good luck!
March 19th, 2008 at 8:05 am, Dana Says:
Seven, I feel you. I think my poundage is what’s causing my secondary infertility. And you what really depresses me? Knowing that I’ll shed the pounds, get pregnant and have to start this process all over again. But I’ll be totally excited to have a baby.
Cheryl, I thought of that, I too, was a former member of the Weight Watchers religion. Believe me, I’m eating enough. 1500 calories at least. I think my biggest problem is eating at 8 p.m. It’s the only time I can sit down and eat a real meal. Through out the day I snack on fruits and veggies.
Daisy, when I first started the elliptical, I quit after 3 minutes. This was a year ago. Gradually I added two minutes every week and finally worked my way to 30. That’s one accomplishment I’m proud of!
March 19th, 2008 at 10:27 am, Debbie Says:
Good luck to you! I’m really envious of your willpower at the gym…I need some of that!
March 19th, 2008 at 1:29 pm, Believer in Balance Says:
First of all, four pounds is progress! Focus on that! Secondly, try not to put so much pressure on yourself. We’ll have fun at BlogHer with or without skinny jeans.
March 19th, 2008 at 2:14 pm, Suebob Says:
I imagine you know every piece of diet advice ever written (don’t we all?) so I am just here to say that you are doing all the right stuff. Keep it up. It seems like everyone I know goes through the “But nothing is happening!!” phase right before they hop on the scale and suddenly 8 lbs is gone.
March 19th, 2008 at 3:30 pm, Elizabeth Says:
You and me and Karen Sugarpants and Christina are all writing this same post in our own words! I got up this morning and my “jeans that are a size I swore I would NEVER be” are TOO TIGHT. There is NO WAY IN HE** I am buying the next bigger size. Now I just have to do something about it.
March 19th, 2008 at 7:29 pm, Wifey's House Says:
It’s hard as #@$%, but you can do it! I lost 70 pounds after my second child, eating right and exercising. It doesn’t happen overnight, but believe me, when it happens you’ll be so happy you stuck with it.
I gained a few, ok, several pounds back after a miscarriage last year and am working hard now to get my body back! So I feel your pain. Patience is key. It sucks, but it’s key! Good luck!
March 21st, 2008 at 9:29 pm, Christina Says:
OK, hon, deep breath. You’ve hit rock bottom, which is good. Now you’re ready to do some serious change.
I think you first have to let go of the guilt. Let it alllll go. You’re allowed to crave food. Take it one day at a time, and if one day doesn’t go as you planned, tell yourself there’s always tomorrow, and you deserve a little indulgence now and then. Don’t let the mind game get the best of you.
And you’ve lost four pounds already - that’s great! Anything greater than 1 pound a week is generally considered unhealthy. I have total faith that you can make the changes you need to make. We’ll all work on it together, right?