February 21, 2008
Bad News for this Mama Bear
It’s 1:29 a.m., and I can’t sleep. I’m worried and anxious. I lost my job today. I’ve never been laid off before. To say that I’m afraid is an understatement. I’m entirely freaked out. And I’m trying to stay positive for the sake of my family, and my mental health. This couldn’t come at a more terrible time. I’m not saying that any time is a good time to be jobless, but holy shit am I scared.
The company I worked for gave me the ax twelve hours ago. They say they were having financial troubles and had to eliminate some positions . Mine was one of them. It sucks ass. But I really think things will get better. I have to believe it or I’ll lose my mind.
There really isn’t much else to say. I’m still in shock. My overloaded brain still thinks I have to get up for work in five hours. I have no idea what I’m going to do. I keep thinking of all the bills we have to pay and worrying about where that money will com from. Selfishly, I keep worrying about how I will get to BlogHerCon in July. Isn’t that crazy? That trip is a luxury and here I am, trying to figure out a way to make it all work.
But it will work out. I have to be optimistic. As they say, “Everything happens for a reason.” Well gosh darn it, Everything, will you please tell me what your reasons are?
I’m thinking I’ll take a few deep breaths, get through the weekend and start evaluating my options on Monday. My head still hurts from crying. And that’s so embarrassing. I’ve been out of work less than a day and I cried about it. I can’t imagine how others who have been out of work for much longer feel. I do know it’s depressing and devastating.
If anyone has any good luck they could send my way, I could really use it.
Posted by Dana @ 1:40 am • Uncategorized
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February 21st, 2008 at 3:28 am, Four Leaf Clover Says:
Things will get better, Dana, I assure you.
February 21st, 2008 at 3:36 am, yoshi Says:
sending all the good luck i can! don’t worry you’ll make do!
February 21st, 2008 at 6:52 am, StephLove Says:
I’m really sorry. I lost my job almost three years ago (albeit with more notice) and I’m still sad about it. (I’m not working but it’s partly by choice.)
February 21st, 2008 at 7:11 am, daisy Says:
I’m sorry and I’m sending you good luck. By being laid off you will get unemployment quicker which should help a bit in the interim while you look at your options.
Take care.
February 21st, 2008 at 7:30 am, Dana Says:
Four Leaf Clover, thank you! I love the name, too. I was born on St. Patrick’s Day. Maybe that in itself will bring me some good luck!
Thanks, Yoshi! I’m sure we will be okay. Things can’t stay yucky for ever.
StephLove, thanks. I’ve been thinking about my options and choices for hours. I’m hoping a light bulb goes on with the right one, soon!
Thanks, Daisy! You’re right. I have to go to the Unemployment office today. Why do I want to vomit when I think about that? It’s funny, because I still remember my father having to o there in 1982, after he got laid off from truck driving. He said it was the best thing that ever happened to him because it prompt him to start his own business. We’ll see what happens with me!
February 21st, 2008 at 7:31 am, Assertagirl Says:
Don’t be embarrassed by the crying…it is a shock to your mind and your ego to have gone through this. Things will get better. Until then, take care of yourself, hon.
February 21st, 2008 at 7:32 am, Dana Says:
Thank you, Assertagirl! I know you’re right. I shouldn’t feel bad for expressing my emotions.
February 21st, 2008 at 7:32 am, Fat Chick Says:
((HUGS)) I’m so sorry! Hang in there! I’m not sure how much good luck I have to send but whatever I can muster, I’ll be sure to send it. Take care hun, ~ FC
February 21st, 2008 at 7:50 am, Dana Says:
Thanks, FC! -hugs galore- I know things have to get better. Hopefully sooner rather than later!
February 21st, 2008 at 7:51 am, biodtl Says:
I’m so sorry to hear this! It’s definitely scary, but you never know - it could be the start of something new and good for you. And you’re not crazy to be thinking about BlogHer. Whenever we have money problems, I immediately start thinking about vacation.
February 21st, 2008 at 8:09 am, Dana Says:
Biodtl, I’m so glad you shared that advice with me. I felt so awful when BlogHer came across my mind. But then I figured I have to be realistic. I will NOT be jobless until July. At least I hope not!
February 21st, 2008 at 8:44 am, Liz Says:
No wonder you couldn’t sleep, poor thing. Your mind is pretty much scrambling your nerves and it’s totally understandable. We’ve been here, too. I know that it doesn’t help saying that. Just, that, you are SO allowed to cry, curse and beat a couple of pillows into submission, right now. Try not to worry too much, though. I am in the “these type of things happen for a reason,” camp and will be more than willing to send you a hug, every day, until you choose your next path. After that, nothing but love!
February 21st, 2008 at 8:59 am, Busy Mom Says:
It’s happened to me 3 times.
It’s very scary, I know. But, I can honestly say that each time, I ended up with something better, and, in retrospect could see it was “meant to be”.
That doesn’t help you right now, though, I know.
Deep breaths, things usually look better in the light of day.
February 21st, 2008 at 9:03 am, Dana Says:
Thank you, Busy Mom! I know you’re right. I do believe it. I just wish I could fix everything right now.
February 21st, 2008 at 9:27 am, Stacey Says:
I’m so sorry, Dana. But, you’re right, things WILL get better! Once you have a chance to get over the shock, you’ll be able to think more clearly and see the options you have. Give yourself a few days to absorb everything–and chill! Hugs to you!
February 21st, 2008 at 10:35 am, mammacheryl Says:
Oh sweetie. I’m so sorry. Try to keep your head up in the pool of grief. Have to keep your head up so you can see the new opportunities you WILL find.
February 21st, 2008 at 12:52 pm, Dana Says:
Stacey, Cheryl — thank you for your support.
-hugs-
February 21st, 2008 at 5:56 pm, Suebob Says:
1. You are smart
2. You are talented
So -
3. It will be okay
Hint: You can volunteer at BlogHer to save conference fees. I was a liveblogger/mike wrangler last year and it was fun.
Hug.
February 21st, 2008 at 6:00 pm, sassymo Says:
Take those deep breaths and let it just plain suck. I firmly believe you have to let things suck so your brain can get used to it, accept it and move on. And then you can start your search for something wonderful.
February 21st, 2008 at 8:26 pm, mom2amara Says:
Hey Dana! Things can only go up from here. The world has a greater reason as to why you were laid off. Only time will tell what wonderful experiences await! ((Hugs))
February 21st, 2008 at 8:41 pm, Christina Says:
Oh, Dana, that sucks! We have narrowly ducked the lay-off ax twice in the past four months, and it’s still not certain that Aaron will keep his job. I understand the stress and the fear of the uncertainty.
But you’re talented and smart - you will find something else. Maybe this is an opening to look for full-time paid blogging or writing work?
February 21st, 2008 at 10:21 pm, Lady M Says:
Ouch - no fun. Wishing you all the best in finding a new job that you really like.
February 22nd, 2008 at 3:57 am, Katie Says:
Oh no, I’m so sorry!
February 22nd, 2008 at 8:37 am, Elizabeth Says:
I’ll be home all day so if you want to call me or IM me just to chat, whether about the job thing or anything else (”Lost”? Big Brother?” lol), I’m here. You are smart and talented and I know you’ll find another job that you enjoy doing. Sending you big hugs and positive vibes across the Interwebs xoxo
February 22nd, 2008 at 9:10 am, The Dana Files » Not So Private Parts Says:
[...] and foremost, I want to thank you all for your comments and e-mails after my very bad day yesterday. I will be eternally grateful for all the good advice, cheerful support and good wishes. There are [...]
February 22nd, 2008 at 6:56 pm, the new girl Says:
Oh man, that sucks. I’m sure it will get better soon but you have every right to cry. It’s a difficult and shocking thing.
crap.
February 28th, 2008 at 7:49 am, The Dana Files » To Catch the Moon Says:
[...] Wednesday, even after receiving awful news, I still managed to catch part of the eclipse. Dawson and I sat next to the window and stared up [...]
February 28th, 2008 at 1:23 pm, Jamie Says:
I read your post on Mommy Bloggers. It sounds like this all might be a blessing in disguise. Hey, at least your floors and toilet sparkle and you are getting in lots of quality mama time!
I work 32 hours a week as an editor for a small publishing company. They have been very supportive of me altering my schedule. Now I telecommute half the week and I have to say I love it. I get out just enough (in the mornings) and I am able to pick up my daughter from kindergarten every day and not put her in after school care. I realize flex schedules like that are not the norm, but if you can do something like that, I highly recommend it! It’s what keeps me working! (outside the home)
Good luck!
February 28th, 2008 at 11:31 pm, Jessica (aka Rose) Says:
Oh wow Dana, that SUCKS. I’m so very very sorry.
I’m sending you lots and lots of good thoughts and good vibes.
Maybe this is going to be a blessing in disguise. Maybe this will lead to amazing opportunities you couldn’t even imagine before! I’m crossing my fingers for you.