December 29, 2007
Training Camp
For the last three days, I’ve been trying to potty-train Dawson. We started this VERY! BIG! DEAL! on Thursday, and it’s been quite a challenge – both for Dawson and for me.
This is the third attempt to ditch the diapers. Dawson has shown interest in the potty chair since he was a little over two years old, but overall, he’s been reluctant to go on the potty consistently.
We’ve had successes, we’ve had failures — but I’m hoping that this will be the time he “gets it”. I’ve had several days off from work so I decided it was the perfect time to create “Potty Training Camp”.
I placed the potty chair in the center of the living room, with the idea that if the potty was close by, perhaps Dawson would be reminded that pee belongs inside it.
Honestly, I have no idea what the hell I’ve gotten myself into. This task is more difficult than I expected it to be, and maybe I was more reluctant to do this than I thought.
I mean, yeah, it would be wonderful to never change another diaper again, but visions of poop and pee on my carpet have haunted me. I worry that I’ll lose my patience (and my will) with each accident I clean off the floor.
But then I thought, it’s now or never – so I invested in several bottles of Resolve carpet cleaner and said, “Let the training begin!”
The first day wasn’t terrible; it was easier than I thought it would be. I put Dawson into some underpants with Lightning McQueen on them. He was happier than a lark.
“Look, Mumma! I got Light’n MaKeen undies on my dupa!” he exclaimed. He seemed very excited, and he peed on the floor twice before he figured out he had to go and ran over to the potty.
I had to watch Dawson’s every move, because I didn’t know his routine. It seemed ridiculous to follow him all over the house, but I didn’t want him to have accidents all over the house. Ironically, I started having flashbacks of potty-training our dog, Murphy — and believe me when I tell you, dog training is so much easier!
Dawson peed in the potty chair twice that day, and when I realized he was crabby and overtired; I put a pull-up on him and sent him to bed. Then I panicked. What if he thought it was a diaper and did all his business in that? What if all the training was reversed?
I decided not to worry about it. I was doing the best I could. I didn’t get mad when he had an accident because I didn’t want to discourage him. I rewarded him with treats for each successful deposit into the potty chair. We were on the right track. That is, until Friday, when he decided he no longer wanted to sit on the potty chair with Elmo and Cookie Monster on it.
I had a little talk with Dawson, telling him that big boys wear underpants and instructed him to pick out a pair from his dresser. He came out wearing his Scooby Doo underpants. I gave Dawson a little pep talk, telling him to try to hold it until he could get to the potty and sit down. Every ten minutes I asked Dawson if he had to use the potty.
“Nope. Pretty soon,” he said.
Then I caught him sitting behind the reclining chair and I knew something was going on back there. (Oh, bad pun!) Sure enough, Dawson had started to go Number 2. I carted him over to the potty chair and told him that poop belongs in there.
With each successful trip to the potty, I told Dawson he could call Grandma and Grandpa and tell them the news.
“Poppa! Nonna! I went on the potty two times today! I’m a big boy!” he shrieked excitedly.
My parents praised him and told me to call every time he went, so that we could form a support network for Dawson. I thought that was a magnificent idea.
Then, this morning, we had another accident. This time, Doug was around for all the commotion.
My husband isn’t so patient with this process, however. His first instinct was to lecture the 3-year-old when he couldn’t make it to the potty chair in time. Dawson had been playing in his room and he screamed, “Daddy, I have to go poop!” while running to the potty, but he didn’t get there fast enough.
I had to lecture my husband — to tell him that he needs to be encouraging, not discouraging and made him apologize to our Doodlebug. I think the hubs is irked at me, but I can’t risk reversing all the time and effort I’ve put into this.
After two and half days of this potty business, I’m starting to have doubts and fears. What if he doesn’t get this? What if I’m not doing this the right way?
On top of that, I feel like a hostage inside my own house. I can’t possibly take him anywhere in the midst of training, because he still doesn’t understand the concept of a big potty yet.
I never imagined that potty-training a toddler would cause me to doubt my parenting skills. But it does. And it’s absolutely awful. This isn’t the first time I’ve felt like a failure as a mother. I remember when I stopped nursing, how guilty I felt, and how I questioned myself over and over again as to whether I made the right decision.
With every milestone my son achieves, I start to wonder if I’m a good mother. It’s ridiculous, I know – but I can’t help it. It must be in my nature. Mother Nature, so-to-speak.
Someone please tell me what to do. I’ve been Googling all morning, but the information is very redundant. Send me your advice! Any tips, tricks or suggestions would be more than welcome! I think I need a support network, too.
RSS feed for comments on this post.
TrackBack URI
December 29th, 2007 at 1:44 pm, mammacheryl Says:
I think you are a great mommy. I have no advice for you, though… I will, however, be watching for what other people tell you because I hope to start training with Ben this next year.
December 29th, 2007 at 2:07 pm, Elizabeth Says:
When we decided to potty train Ryan, we took it very slowly step by step. I put a dry erase calendar on the wall of the bathroom, and at first, all I did was give him a gold star sticker on the calendar for simply agreeing to sit on the potty. Then, I took a big jar and filled it with Hershey’s kisses. Every time he sat and tried to go, he got one. Then, he got one every time any amount of pee went in the potty.
He stayed in PullUps at night for a LONG time, like until he was almost four. I didn’t see a nighttime or nap time PullUp as a step backward, I saw it as a way for him to be able to relax and sleep.
We didn’t use a regular “potty chair” on the floor, we had one that fit on the toilet seat with little steps to climb up and handles. When Nathan started expressing interest, we used the same one for him. He had a much easier time staying dry at night than Ryan did.
Feel free to message or call me anytime if you want some support!
December 29th, 2007 at 2:44 pm, Jean Says:
Long time lurker here…figures I’d come out on assvice for potty training.
It sounds like you’re doing a great job. Persitance is really the key, if things do get too frustrating for both of you ease off for a week or so.
I’m sure you’ve read to set a timer for 30 minutes or so from the last pee. This works sometimes. Every kid is different.
I say keep persisting but also don’t over do it by making him go every 5 minutes.
You’ll just be amazed when the light bulb comes on and he just gets it.
Good Luck! I’ve really enjoyed your blog.
December 29th, 2007 at 3:34 pm, Amber Says:
For three and a half years, we have tried and failed. And finally something -I don’t know what - clicked this week and she has gone three days with no accidents. And I am weeping tears of joy for my Christmas miracle….
December 31st, 2007 at 9:02 am, mom2amara Says:
Girl, I just knew in my heart of hearts that Amara would be the kindergartener still in pull ups because I couldn’t get her to potty train.
But I was wrong. And you know that Dawson will be going in the toilet before you know it.
I actually *miss* carrying a diaper bag.
I know it feels like you can’t go anywhere but honestly, it’s been a year and half since Amara’s been potty trained and unfortunately, we still have accidents. It’s just a part of childhood.
You are a terrific mom! You and Dawson will be OK
March 17th, 2008 at 7:04 am, The Dana Files » Bits and Pieces of Bloggy Stuff Says:
[...] Dawson is officially potty-trained. I started the training boot camp at the end of December and you may remember my frustrations. January was rough. He had a few accidents. February was better, he still wore a pull-up for [...]