September 25, 2007
No Pink Lines Here
Sunday afternoon my husband invited his friend Dan and my father over to watch the Packer game. Football is big in my family, and if you’re not a Packer fan, then you’ll suffer “the consequences”, which usually involves a bet with my father and an eventual head shaving. This is a blog post in itself, so just take my word for it. It gets ugly. And if you’re a Chicago Bears fan? My father will tease you and rib you forever.
My mom came along with my dad and we left the “boys party” to take a trip to Walmart. It was supposed to be just us, but at the last minute Doug and my dad asked if we’d take Dawson along. So much for a break from the toddler.
I purchased some new fall/winter clothes for Dawson, two new plants (one is Baby’s Tears and the other is English Ivy — they are gorgeous), dog food for Murphy, various feminine hygiene products and a pregnancy test. I figured it was time to stop playing the waiting game and just pee on the stick already.
After everyone left, I did my business and came up with a negative result. Just like I knew I would. Just like all the other times before (well, except when Dawson was conceived of course).
I didn’t cry. I didn’t get irrational or very upset. But I was sad and quiet the rest of the evening. Doug didn’t say very much. I don’t know if he was sad or relieved. Maybe a combination of both.
I still have no idea when the period will show up. I dropped off the prescription for the BP meds. I suppose I should start taking them, now that we know I’m not pregnant.
But there’s just one thing; when I was pregnant the first time, I had two negative pregnancy tests before a positive pink line appeared. My ob/gyn attributed it to my lengthy menstrual cycles, and said that the hCG hormone appears much later for me.
So, there’s still hope. Maybe.
And now my mind is playing tricks on me. I felt nauseous yesterday. I’m over tired today.
It’s just stress, I know that. But for real…I can hope right? Blah. I’m just setting myself up for disappointment later.
I’m going to the gym. I have twenty-five pounds to lose by January 1st. Wish me luck.
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**Be sure to visit my guest essay at The Mommybloggers, if you feel so inclined!
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September 25th, 2007 at 4:38 am, mammacheryl Says:
Good luck with the weight loss. I’m kind of looking forward to hitting the gym after Anna is born. Walmart pregger tests aren’t very sensitive to begin with, so maybe the results will be different in a week. Here’s wishing you more morning sickness.
September 25th, 2007 at 6:34 am, mom2amara Says:
I’m sorry Dana. ((HUGS)) I know the disappointment of a non-existent pink line. No tears but the deep hurt is there. So are the sore boobs and the “morning sickness.”
But this morning you’ll see Dawson and he will make all that disappointment turn into excitement because you’ll lament on what a fantastic big brother he will be.
And you know what they say, weight loss helps with fertility…so pump some iron, girl! Have a good workout!
September 25th, 2007 at 8:29 am, Dana Says:
Cheryl, I bought an EPT — one of those “early detection” ones. But I suppose it doesn’t matter. I’m good. Sweating my ass of made me feel a little better.
I can’t wait until Anna is born. I wish I could come up and see you when you have her. Babies always cheer me up!
Mom2Amara — thanks darling! I’m sure things will work out. I mean, I kind of have to hope or else what’s the point?
September 25th, 2007 at 9:07 am, Julie Says:
Isn’t it strange how our brain can make our bodies feel certain things — nauseated, tired, even hungry? I will never cease marveling over this phenomenon. It’s the reason I can’t read the “possible side-effects may include” parts of my prescription directions — because I’ll get ‘em all!
September 25th, 2007 at 9:51 am, Dana Says:
Julie, I’m the same way about those damn “side effects”. It’s a mind over matter situation!
September 25th, 2007 at 11:16 am, ali Says:
i’m so sorry to hear about the non-pink line. so sorry.
(but, just so you know…i’m a YUGE packer fan.
)
September 25th, 2007 at 12:55 pm, Miss Says:
Well like you said, no negatives equal a positive for you. I’ve still got my fingers crossed!
September 25th, 2007 at 2:23 pm, Dana Says:
Thanks, Ali! Thanks, Miss!
September 25th, 2007 at 3:14 pm, ~JJ! Says:
I’m so sorry.
I am sending you hugs. I know this is hard.
September 25th, 2007 at 5:27 pm, motherofbun Says:
I had two negative tests before I got a positive with my son too. So maybe there’s still hope.
Sending you hugs and wishing you lots of success in this babymaking business.
September 25th, 2007 at 8:50 pm, A Whole Lot of Nothing Says:
Wishing you pink lines in your next pee.
September 26th, 2007 at 6:44 pm, Dana Says:
I’m sorry for your missing pink lines. You don’t know me, but I’m a “Dana” too. *grin* And I’m Catholic. Yeah! I wanted to let you know that those pills are awful for you. And NFP is great at preventing pregnancy when there’s a need, but better yet, it’s VERY helpful at achieving pregnancy. It’s great, easy, and no yucky chemicals messing with a woman’s already delicate system. I’m glad I stumbled across your blog. Prayers for you, your adorable son, and your future children.
October 3rd, 2007 at 3:59 pm, Leslie Says:
I’m sorry, Dana. It will happen. Truly. I had my share of singular pink lines when I was waiting, hoping and praying for two. It will happen. Give it time. Just be healthy - get that body ready for baby. It’ll come.