June 9, 2007

Confrontation a la Grocery Store

Dawson awoke at the crack of chaos demanding “tricky surreal wiff miwk.”

I awoke not surprised to find out we’re out of milk.

Since the Doodlebug had no intentions of eating a “waffo” instead, I got dressed in my sweats and a stained t-shirt and then took Dawson, still in his pajamas, to the store.

When I pulled into the parking lot of Copps Food Center, the very store that my husband works at, I saw a car pulling out of the third stall from the store’s entrance.

I pulled in closer and put on my signal to indicate I was going to take that spot once the car was out of the way.

To my surprise and dismay, a man in his late 50s pulled forward from his stall into the one I was waiting for. He decided he wanted to be able to pull forward instead of backing out of his original stall. His wife got out of the car and headed into the store, while he sat in his truck and waited for her.

I was pissed. There was absolutely no reason for his behavior.

I rolled down my window and called to the driver, “Sir, I was waiting for that spot. I had my signal on and you saw me.”

“Screw you, lady. There are other parking places,” he said.

“Did you just say ‘screw you’ to me? That was completely uncalled for.”

“Lady, I’m much older than you. You need to learn to respect your elders.”

“You may be an old fart, but that doesn’t give you the right to be an asshole. Get a clue.”

I thought about just driving around the aisle into the spot he vacated to steal mine. That would be the easy thing to do, right?

I don’t know if it was the fact that I didn’t get enough sleep or if I was forced awake by a demanding two-year-old, but I was not in the mood to take this guy’s crap.

I inched my car right in front of his truck and turned off the engine.

“What the fuck are you doing, woman? Get your piece of junk out of the way.”

I just smiled politely and waited. The man threatened to smash into my car and I just kept smiling. I smiled for 15 minutes until his wife came out of the store. The look on her face showed annoyance and embarrassment. I didn’t care.

When she was in the truck, he demanded once more that I move my car or he’d crash into me. I just smiled and waited, almost daring him with my eyes to do it.

“Move your g*ddamned car!” he yelled once more.

“Screw you, dickhead.” I responded. I was tired of smiling at that point.

Luckily for me, no one parked in the stall behind him and he finally backed out and drove away.

It was the most empowering feeling. I proceeded to park my car in my place and Dawson and I went inside to get the milk.

A woman in the foyer of the store smiled at me and said, “I wish I had your balls, girl. That was awesome.”

I smiled and nodded. You’re damned right it was, I thought to myself.

Posted by Dana @ 10:30 am • Confessions   
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11 Responses to “Confrontation a la Grocery Store”

  1. Woo-hoo! That’s a great story.

  2. Wow, Dana. That was ballsy.

    It reminds me of something my grandmother did when I was younger. We were in the car together, stopped at a light and when it turned green, the guy behind us beeped his horn. I guess she didn’t move fast enough. So, she parked the car and turned it off. She sat there through two lights and when he yelled or beeped, she shrugged, as if the car wouldn’t start. It was awesome. Scary, but awesome.

  3. Way to respect those elders! Who crapped is his Wheaties anyway?

  4. DANA! You are my IDOL. WOw. That WAS awesome!

  5. You kick total ass, Dana. I hope his wife gave him an earful on the way home. His mommy must not have loved him very much to raise such a crabby, ungracious man.

  6. That is totally something that I would do. The nerve of that man! He’s older, he should be more mature and chivalrous (is that a word? Did I spell it right? Probably not).

  7. I have to agree - that was awesome. Nicely done!

  8. Lady M — I was practically shaking while I was sitting in front of his car. I thought for sure the cops were going to come and haul me away for being insane. :)

    Leslie — I know! I can’t believe myself sometimes. When I told Doug about it, he was half-laughing and wee bit angry because he thought I was trying to embarrassing him. (He works there.) I told him to grow up. :)

    Brenda — Hahaha. I’m such a badass, no?

    Lisa, thanks! I’m proud of myself. Even though I probably shouldn’t be. I’m just tired of taking crap from people.

    Cheryl, anytime you need me to come and yell at anyone, lemme know. :)

    Debbie, if you would do it then you rawk, too! :D

    Kel, thanks! I’m still laughing about it every few moments.

  9. Hey, did you read my recent story about yelling at the old farts in the restaurant when I was on vacation? Sounds like you and I are peas in a pod. Heh.

  10. Nancy!! Oh my gosh! Did I miss that one? I’ll have to go find it! I wanna know what you said!

  11. That was AWESOME. Did you really say “screw you, dickhead”? More awesome.

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Editor In Chief

Dana Tuszke began her Mom career in 2004 after the birth of her son, Dawson the Demanding. She spends her days catering to the endless needs of a 4-year-old, vacuuming the never-ending trail of cookie crumbs in her living room, and suffering through too many episodes of Drake & Josh (or is it Zack & Cody?); all while working from home.
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