There are some women who proclaim themselves feminists and really just hate men. I suppose it is their right, but yes, it does ring terribly for the rest of the women.

Feminism is not about the woman ruling the man - it’s about the man *not* ruling the woman.

I could very well be wrong about this, but I like to think that most of us in this generation have a more equal view of things and don’t break everything in our marriages, homes and families into “men’s work” and “women’s work.” AND that most of us are realistic enough to figure out what each partner in the marriage needs to do to make ends meet and best meet the other (non-financial) needs of the family.

I always wanted to be able to stay at home to raise my children, but I never actually believed that would happen because I figured my husband and I would both have to work to make ends meet. As it turned out I got very lucky and I *am* able to stay home with the kids - but while my husband does not fully understand the difficulty of raising these girls alone every day while he is at work for 12 or so hours, he sure as hell doesn’t expect to come home to a spotless home with dinner on the table. Often he picks dinner up on his way home (if he’s actually going to be here at that hour), other times he cooks for the family when he gets here.

We both do what is needed to give our girls and ourselves what we need. Yes, it is stressful to be the sole breadwinner. Yes, it is stressful to be the sole childcare provider. There *are* definite inequalities because men and women see things differently, and we probably both have expectations of the other that are unrealistic.

But to expect one partner in the marriage to provide everything and not have any other input than to bring home the bacon? That’s utterly ridiculous. I am very surprised that that caller cited feminist writing in her argument, because from what you wrote I can’t see how what she’s asking for has anything to do with feminism.

I do think that MANY people who call themselves feminists have gone off the deep end and become man-haters, and that has given Feminism a bad name. People often lose sight of the true point of feminism.

I think some men are becoming threatened by women who are assertive and powerful.

Do you think some women are afraid to fall into the stereotype of wife/mother/homemaker if they choose to stay at home? Because they don’t want their partners/husbands to feel superior because they have a job outside the home?

I wonder if this caller wants to be home with her kids but also wants to make sure her husband doesn’t “rule her”? I might not be making my point very clear, please forgive me.

I know…. it’s only an opinion.

I think there’s a lot more to be learned and research about this. And yes, we really should think and discuss this more.

I’m interested in hearing what everyone has to say.

This is a subject that should receive a lot more thought and discussion than it usually does. Thanks.

If there are some men out there, who do want to be more involved in their marriages and their children’s lives why aren’t they out there lobbying for better laws for child protection. Or for longer and paid maternity leaves for mothers AND fathers.

It is something to think about. I’m glad you’re wondering like I am.

Are men getting the “shit end of the stick”? I don’t know. I see men running the governments and the major corporations. If they have the “shit end,” did they give it to themselves?

Just wondering.

But this woman made it sound like women shouldn’t have to do anything if they don’t want to and I was wondering if she was an extreme feminist. I so wish I could have heard the beginning of this conversation so I’d know how it began.