July 24, 2006

Hot Child in the City

“He’s gotta wear shades!”

This weekend was hot. Humid. No rain for a few days. And we don’t have A/C in our house. Well, unless you count the window unit that really doesn’t cool the whole house. Needless to say we tried to stay cool. Three humans and a canine in one bed is not my idea of a fun time.

Things you would have heard if you were a fly on the wall:

“Dawson, stop that. Daddy doesn’t like a wet crotch.”

“Don’t lean so close to me, I don’t want your hairy chest hairs up my nose.”

“Why do you always have to fart in here? Cantcha go to France and do that?”

“NO! Stop pinching Mumma’s boobs!”

“Dana, will you please stop flurfing him up?”

“No, I didn’t bring my wife over because she drinks too much.”

“Hey Mister, do I know you? Have we met? You look like the guy I married five years ago.”

July 21, 2006

Turtle Trouble

On Sunday evening, Doug and I were in the garden. He was weeding. I was taking pictures of all the fruits of our his labor. I had just snapped a picture of our tomato plants when Doug started laughing.

“Holy Crap!” he said through his laughter. “Murphy! How did you get over there?”

I turned around to see our dog, Murphy, on the other side of our fence. He was gallivanting in the neighbor’s yard. I called his name and he came right up to the fence and laid on the grass, taunting me to come over and get him. He knows how to play the “chase me all over the neighborhood” game very well.

While Doug went around to capture our rebellious canine, I proceeded to walk the fence line to see if Murphy had dug any holes under the fence to escape. It’s just a cheap little fence to keep the dog and Dawson away from the road behind our house. As I was perusing the fence line, I shrieked! There in the grass, running the fence line, was a turtle. A TURTLE!

“Doug! Come here!” I yelled.

“What? Did you find a hole in the fence?”

“Ummm. No….but I did find THAT!” I pointed.

“It’s just a turtle. Are you really this girly? Here, hold him!” he said. He picked up the slimy looking thing and proceeded to hand him to me. I freaked out and said there was no way I was holding that turtle. He taunted me by dangling the little thing in my face.

“Chicken!” he said. “I wonder where he came from.”

“I’m not getting my finger bitten off. No thank you. He probably wandered over from the river.”

Little Plover River was a 1/4 mile away from our house. We always walk the path to the park and we figure our little pal walked a long way to get into our backyard. But we have no clue how he got into the fence!

“Awww. C’mon. He won’t bite.”

I declined again and Dawson toddled over to see what we were talking about. He immediately clang to my leg when he saw his daddy put “Terry the Turtle” on the ground. The little amphibian sure moved fast. Suddenly, Murphy caught wind of Terry and decided to poke and prod at the poor thing.

“Doug, we need to get him back to the river.”

After playing with Terry and giving him a dip in our rain barrel, we grabbed an old pail and put Terry in it. I called it the Turtle Taxi. We packed Dawson in his stroller and attached Murphy to his leash and the four of us went to release Terry in his natural habitat. Such good little environmentalists we are. We found a low clearing by the river and let Terry into the water.

“Buh-bye, turd!” Dawson said, his little fist opening and closing into a wave. “Buh-bye.”

When we got home, Dawson seemed a little sad.

“What’s the matter, bug?”

“No mo turd, Mumma.”

“Oh!” I laughed. “Yes, no more turtle. He went home.”

July 19, 2006

BlogMe: Meet Christina!

******** In honor of BlogMe 2006, I have had the pleasure of interviewing Christina from A Mommy Story. She’s smart, she’s funny, and she’s an amazing mother. Her daughter Cordy is a month younger than my Dawson and is WAY adorable!

I adore Christina and I know you will, too.

Guaranteed.

She was so worried about her answers being too long, and gave me permission to edit her interview. But, I could never do that!!! Her answers are wonderful as usual!

1. Talk about your blog. What can I learn about you in under 5 minutes?
In under 5 minutes, you can learn that I have one of the most stubborn, strong-willed, independent, yet cute toddlers on the planet. And that I often have no idea where I’m going with a post I’m writing, and the end doesn’t always match the beginning.

2. Are you and your blogging persona the same person?
For the most part. My blogging persona is that inner voice that is often shouting her opinion at others, but in real life I’m a little more shy and less likely to really tell people what I think. I’m pretty sure my blogging persona is cooler than me.

3. How would you describe your writing style?
Stream of consciousness. I think of a topic to write about, start writing, and then only go back to spell check for the most part. If I have to sit down and outline a post, it’s too much work for me and I won’t ever get it done.

4. What don’t you write about? Anything considered a no-no in your book?
I generally don’t write about politics much, because to me it’s something not worth fighting about. I’ll make the occasional joke at the government, but I try to stay out of heated discussions revolving around politics. Oh, and I don’t write about when my husband pisses me off much, either, but that’s because he reads my blog.

5. Have you written anything controversial? Is blogging controversial?
Oh yeah, blogging can be controversial. Anytime you have people from all different backgrounds and beliefs together and talking, an argument or disagreement is bound to crop up from time to time. The most controversial thing I’ve written lately is a post about a woman who made beautiful digital art detailing her feelings about her c-section. I wrote a brief version of how I felt with my c-section, also, and how I thought it was horrible. I wasn’t expecting people to find it controversial, but they did. Some women really were upset that I was speaking so harshly about c-sections, and they felt women shouldn’t be criticized for wanting an elective c-section. Truthfully, I never said anything against their right to do as they please. I said I think they’re horrible and impersonal and I hope to never have another one ever again.

6. What is your favorite thing that you wrote? What got a strong reaction from readers? Links please?

Well, certainly the c-section post. But my favorite post has to be the MNT Wrestling match post. And I also liked my first Mommy Wars post.

7. How do you feel about meeting bloggers in real life?
I will be attending BlogHer (thanks to Queen of Spain for sponsoring me), and with it being a week away, I’m terrified. I’m excited also, but I worry that everyone will meet me in person and then say, “Why do we read her blog, anyway?” I’m also meeting a smaller group of Ohio bloggers tonight, so I’m considering it practice for BlogHer.

8. Which blogs do you read every day, rain or shine?
That’s a tough one. I read anyone who has commented on my previous post each day. My blog superstars, though, are Queen of Spain, Mrs. Chicky, Her Bad Mother, Motherhood Uncensored, and several more (I just realized that the list was so long I would take up way too much space for the answer).

9. Have you ever anonymously posted on a site to flame them?
Never. I hate it when it’s done to me, so I don’t think I could ever do it to someone else, even if I didn’t like them. If it’s something I feel that strongly about, I’ll leave my name.

10. What important parenting advice would you give to other moms of toddlers?
Uh, don’t listen to advice? Just kidding, but there is a nugget of truth in there. Toddlers are so crazy and so unpredictable that you never know what you’re going to get. My friends with toddlers have children that are so different from Cordy – each with their own strange fears and obsessions. I think the most important thing to do when parenting a toddler is take the time to learn about that little person, and don’t just assume they’re like you. By learning the nuances of their personality, you can tailor your parenting style to what works for them. It’s a win-win situation, and hopefully will prepare you for when they’re teens!

July 15, 2006

Blog Me, Baby!

In case you haven’t heard about BlogMe yet, please go here to read all about it.

The Caffeinated Librarian was kind enough to interview me. Some of the questions I couldn’t resist answering so I added them in. Please check out her blog, too!

Here are the answers to my BlogMe questions. I just didn’t have the chance to interview anyone. (Note: Until yesterday. See Christina’s interview above!) But please join us and complete your own survey if you have the time!

1. Talk about your blog. What can I learn about you in under 5 minutes?
I started blogging (officially) in April 2006. I had tried it in 2004 when I was pregnant. I made one post and forgot about it until 2 years later when I was reading The Caffeinated Librarian’s blog. Her writing inspired me so much that I decided to try it again and instantly fell in love with the concept. I’ve always loved writing to begin with and this forum is amazing and rewarding. My blog is very broad (and I assume most blogs are), I write about so many different topics, ideas, theories and daily events. In less than five minutes of reading my blog, you will realize I have a quirky, dorky, silly personality and my sense of humor is contagious. I can make you laugh like a hyena in less time than it would take you to read my blog entry!

2. How do you use blogging to build friendships?
I think building friendships through blogging is a natural occurrence. We start reading other blogs and meet people who share our interests. We realize we have things in common with these bloggers and comment about how much we love their points of view or share a similar story. As time goes on we create a bond with these writers and it’s almost as strong as it would be if you’d known the person all your life.

3. Who do you read every day, rain or shine?
Mocha Momma, Dooce, Granny Gets A Vibrator, The Caffeinated Librarian, A Mommy Story, The Queen of Spain, Mom 101, Finslippy and The Company Bitch.

4. Why did you choose to share that piece of yourself in a photograph?
I think my hands are the strongest part of me. Metaphorically, they are the masters that perform all the tasks my over flowing brain wishes to accomplish. They type my blog, they show that I’m someone’s wife, they write love notes to my husband, they tousle Dawson’s hair when he wants his “Mumma Time”, they wash the dishes, they do the cooking, the cleaning and the occasional slapping of my forehead when I’ve done something stupid. And I think they represent my past and all the things I’ve accomplished and also my future and all the things I wish to do “someday”. In a way, they hold the keys that unlock the doors.

5. How would you describe your writing style?
I’m on the spot and I can’t describe it. I can’t find the right word or words. I think I’m humorous, but fear that others may not think so. I think I’m witty, but fear that others may think I’m boring or bland. I think my writing is honest and tactful (unless we’re talking politics then I get pretty heated). I think the better question would be: How do your readers describe your writing? Maybe I’ll open a forum topic or interview about that!

6. If you could spend time with one person (other than your spouse, because really, let’s not rack up the suck up points here), who would it be?
I would love to be cute and funny and tell you how I’d like to meet some famous celebrity (Clive Owen comes to mind), but I know the odds of bumping into him at the corner grocery are slim to none. In all honesty, I’d love to meet Kelly, Erin & Christina because I’ve been reading their blogs and I feel like part of their extended family. But I have to confess: These ladies are amazing writers and bold bloggers. I have this secret fear I would bore them to death. Isn’t it funny how much we can adore a person and secretly feel nervous to meet them? Am I the only neurotic person who thinks like this? (You can tell the truth! I can handle it!)

7. What don’t you write about? Anything considered a no-no in your book?
I don’t write about my friends and family when I’m upset with them. I’ve been vague, but I think people figure it out. Basically, I don’t write about someone if I can’t tell him or her straight up how I feel. And if I need to vent, I do it vaguely and generally. I guess my rule of thumb is: Don’t write anything you wouldn’t want “someone” to read. We all have those “someones” that we fear will read our blog and ridicule us. Or maybe that’s just neurotic me again!

8. How do you feel about meeting bloggers in real life? Are you nervous? Will you have great expectations? What do you hope to take away from the BlogHer experience?
I so wish I were going to BlogHer. I didn’t know what it was until a few short months ago and did not have time to make any arrangements so soon. I look forward to the possibility of going next year. But if I had the opportunity to meet bloggers I don’t think I would be too nervous. I would be excited! Then that perfect bubble would burst and I’d think, “What if they don’t like “me” after they meet me?” Hey! You know who needs to get some self-confidence? MOI! (nervous laugh)

9. So soon we’re going to meet each other at BlogHer. Important question. How do you party?
I was a former bartender. What do you think? =)

10. What is your favorite thing that you wrote? What got a strong reaction from readers? Links please?
My favorite post is recent. Right here. As for strong reaction, I’m not sure. I don’t think I’ve written anything that got a strong reaction yet.

11. Have you written anything controversial? Is blogging controversial?
Yes. This, right here. And this one. I think this is a touchy subject, but I had to get my thoughts out of my head. I think blogging is only controversial for those who don’t blog. They think we bloggers are “wasting our time” or just “sounding off all the time”. But those of in the blogosphere do it for more reasons than I can count. And we all have something to say. What a better way to do it than by blogging?

12. Are you and your blogging persona the same person?
Yes. 98% of the time. I think the security of anonymity (until you start getting lots of local readership) makes it easier to divulge information about yourself, but overall I’m just as nutty offline as I am when I’m blogging.

13. Have you ever anonymously posted on a site to flame them?
No. I’ve always attached my name to my comments and I don’t “flame” because I realize there is a person with feelings behind that screen and we all can’t agree on everything all the time. If we did, it would be one boring world.

14. If you had a super power, what would it be?
Invisibility. I say this because my toddler will not let me pee in peace. This way if he can’t see me, I can do my business without listening to him cry, “Mumma, pee pee! (laugh, laugh, laugh) NO Mumma. No pee pee!”

15. What are the five things that you could not live without?
Currently, Air Conditioning. It’s 90 degrees here today. Then I’d have to say chewing gum, my computer so that I can blog, my library card to check out all the new books and lastly toe nail clippers. I’ve seen some ladies this weekend with vulture toes and you just don’t wanna get me started on how yucky that is!