May 26, 2006

I Look Like My Mother

98. I’m told I’m just like my mother. In looks and manners.

I look exactly like my mother. So much, that people often mistake me for her. It can be irritating at times. How someone doesn’t know this, when we are 28 years apart is beyond me. Sometimes I don’t know if their error is a compliment to me or to her. It usually happens at church picnics. I’ll be polka dancing with my father and after a dance, someone will come up to my father and say hello.

“Frank! How you been ol’ buddy? Good to see you!” they’ll say. Then the offender will turn to me and say, “Monica! You’re looking beautiful as ever.” I usually turn a few shades of red, smile and say, “Actually, I’m Monica’s daughter, Dana.” They usually become embarrassed, but I’ll shake hands and have a conversation with the person until my mother comes over to talk as well.

I guess it’s a trait in my family for generations. I look like Mom, she looks like Grandma Alice and Grandma Alice looks like her mother. And if I do say so myself, they are some gorgeous ladies.

My mom has dark brown hair and hazel eyes. She has a warm smile and a light complexion. Growing up I remember how she wouldn’t like to sit in the sun for fear of sunburn because of her light skin. She’d slather the sunblock on us because she didn’t want any of us to get skin cancer. I have my moms facial features. Her oval face, her narrow nose, her jawline. But I have my father’s blue eyes and my hair is light brown. But I can tell it’s getting darker. I bet it will be black by the time I’m 35.

I don’t really remember what Grandma Alice looked like in her younger days. The pictures I look at are either in black and white or faded color. But I’m pretty certain she had light brown hair, too. Perhaps that is where I got that trait.

All three of us have a widow’s peak. I hated that damn thing when I was in junior high because when I curled my bangs, the widow’s peak was more like a freakin’ cowlick and my bangs wouldn’t hold up. I once tried to shave it. BIG MISTAKE! It grew in all funny. My grandmother would tell me that I should be proud to have this trait like Vivien Leigh. I don’t think Scarlett had a widow’s peak, not that I can see.

I denied my resemblence to my mom for a long time. It wasn’t until 1999 that I had some of those “Glamor Shots” done and I realized I am my mom. When those pictures came back I nearly passed out. It was like looking at my mom and not myself. Everyone I showed them to, said I looked like Monica. It was a little strange at first.

When I became a mother, I really became my mom. I say some of the same things she says! For example, “Don’t jump on the furniture!” “Stop yelling, you’re driving me crazy!” “I’m not sleeping, I’m resting my eyes…” the list goes on. It’s uncanny. Genetics I can understand, but behaviors are completely strange. Do we really pick up on the manners of our parents?

I suppose that’s just the way it goes. I love my mother very much and if I’m destined to be just like her, than I’m okay with that.